Naamah's Kiss - Jacqueline Carey [183]
I said it aloud. "Bao."
The light in the cabin had grown dim. His eyes glittered. "Now you know. You ask why Master Lo seeks to join us together with his medicine. I don't know. Maybe he thinks you will hate me if you learn the truth first."
"No." I shook my head. "No, I don't think so. I think mayhap he knew you needed to speak of this, and I needed…" I flushed. "Well."
Bao laughed.
I smiled. "You walked away. How can I hate you for somewhat you didn't do? As for the rest…" I shrugged. "You did what you set out to do. You're not that person anymore." I thought a moment. "Did you ever hear the tale of the stolen D'Angeline prince?"
"No."
So I told him the story of Prince Imriel de la Courcel, who was stolen by slave-traders as a boy and subjected to unimaginable horrors in distant Drujan before being rescued by two of the realm's greatest heroes. I told him how Prince Imriel wrote openly in his memoirs of struggling to be a good person despite the memories that haunted him; and how he had grown up to become a great hero in his own right, saving Terre d'Ange from an insidious peril.
Bao listened intently. "I know some of that story," he said when I'd finished. "There was Ch'in women in that place. Drujan."
I'd forgotten. "Aye, that's one of the things that piqued Master Lo's curiosity about Terre d'Ange, wasn't it?"
"Uh-huh." He nodded, thoughtful.
I rubbed my eyes, fighting a yawn. It was late and I was tired; I had a vague memory of someone knocking politely on the door hours ago with an offer of dinner. Now it was almost pitch-black in the cabin.
"Sleep," Bao said immediately. "I'll go."
"Stay if you like," I offered.
He hesitated, then climbed out of bed and fumbled for his clothing. "No. You need to think about what I told you. I was not like the prince in your story, Moirin. What I did, I chose for myself. And what I chose to make of myself was nothing more than an ordinary thug."
"Not so ordinary," I said sleepily. "At least you were a prince of thugs. Bao, are you really afraid I have a destiny that's going to swallow you whole?"
"Uh-huh." An unexpected grin glinted in his shadowy face. "Only now I think maybe it's worth it."
* * *
CHAPTER FIFTY-SEVEN
In the bright light of day the next morning, both Bao and I were afflicted by the self-consciousness that can accompany a sudden shift from familiarity into intimacy. He flushed when I emerged from my cabin, busying himself with boiling a kettle of water on our small brazier. I watched his strong, sinewy hands as he poured the water for Master Lo's tea, remembering how good they'd felt on my breasts.
"Ah!" Master Lo sipped his tea with pleasure. "So?"
Bao and I glanced at one another. He cleared his throat. "Ah… very tonic, Master."
"Very tonic," I agreed. "Master Lo… why? You told me once that it was best to let go of desire."
"So I did." He regarded me. "I believe I underestimated its force in your nature. Your desire for Raphael de Mereliot led you into folly; and yet if I understand what I observed, your desire for Queen Jehanne led her to a greater peace and wisdom. It may be that the gods of Terre d'Ange have their own ways of guiding their children to harmony."
"All ways lead to the Way," I said, remembering what he'd said yesterday.
Master Lo inclined his head. "Even so."
"What about me?" Bao asked.
His mentor eyed him tranquilly. "It would have happened sooner or later, but you have a stubborn and contrary streak, my magpie. I thought you needed a push."
Bao gave him a skeptical look. "Hmm."
"Is anyone complaining?" Master Lo inquired. "Because the sounds I heard for many hours do not suggest a pair of healthy young people with anything to complain about."
This time, I flushed.
Bao grinned at me. "No," he said. "You?"
I shook my head. "No."
"Good." Master Lo blew on his tea and took another delicate sip. "Then