Naamah's Kiss - Jacqueline Carey [274]
I hated those.
But I did it, I did it all. And all the while, my diadh-anam shone steadily inside me, an unerring compass promising that I had not chosen unwisely.
Calling insistently to its other half, too.
I learned to ignore the call as best I could, concentrating on the task at hand, using the lessons Master Lo had taught me. I wondered if Bao was doing the same.
The bulk of the Imperial army dispersed, sent to the various posts from which they had been summoned. With the core that remained, we travelled up the river in ships drawn by teams of oxen, stopping along the way to root out more of Lord Jiang and Black Sleeve's accomplices. Traces of their memories remained inside me, tingeing my thoughts with the taste of smoke and metal.
I wished I could be rid of it.
It sparked an uncomfortable thought in me. When this was over, I would be the last person in the world with detailed knowledge of how the weapons of the Divine Thunder were built and wielded. Gods knew, I would take it to my grave. But I did not know if the Emperor trusted me enough to believe it.
I kept my fear to myself, but it made me uncomfortable and withdrawn, and Snow Tiger noticed it. She didn't press me, but she watched me with such a look of troubled concern that I broke down and confessed my fear to her.
"No, of course not!" The princess' eyes widened with horror. "My father would never do such a thing to you."
"He would have done it to six hundred soldiers," I reminded her.
"Six hundred soldiers who took up arms against the Throne of Heaven. Six hundred soldiers who were not sent by strange gods to the aid of Ch'in." Her expression turned fierce. "Even if the thought crossed his mind, I would not allow it. I will not let anyone harm you, Moirin."
It made me smile, hearing an echo of the dragon's words in her voice. She recognized it and smiled too, a little sadly.
"I suspect he would come roaring all the way from White Jade Mountain if anyone in Ch'in raised a hand to you," she said. "So do not think it."
I believed her.
Although it seemed as though our journey and my immense, impossible task would never end, in time it did. We crossed into territory that had never left Imperial control, and there were no more rumors of accomplices. I was content to watch the river unfurl beneath us, the green landscape slide past. Bao was right, I had come to love this country.
I wished he would come back.
But he didn't.
* * *
CHAPTER EIGHTY-NINE
We returned to Shuntian in triumph. There was a week's worth of celebrating, of parades and fetes and displays of pageantry beyond my imagining. The streets were thronged with revelers. Even in the Celestial City, the mood of orderly decorum gave way to one of joy.
If Bao had been there, I would have loved every minute of it. Even in his absence, I took pleasure in it.
Out of curiosity, I went to the quarters that we had rented with Master Lo, now occupied by a nice young family. The wife told me that Bao had been there some weeks earlier. He had retrieved the snowdrop bulbs that Master Lo had reluctantly left behind to dry.
For some reason, that gave me a pang of hurt and jealousy. I wondered what in the world he meant to do with them.
Nothing, mayhap. Mayhap they were just one last souvenir of his beloved mentor, whom I had helped to die.
When I thought of it that way, I could better understand why Bao needed to be away from me. But it didn't lessen the yearning of my diadh-anam inside me.
I knew where he was, of course. I always knew. He was somewhere northwest of Shuntian, no longer on the move. Whatever he was doing, my stubborn peasant-boy had decided to stay put for a while. So I stayed where I was, and waited for him to come to me. Like me, he knew perfectly well where I was.
Apart from Bao's absence, it was a pleasant time. I was an Imperial favorite, the noble heir's attendant, the jade-eyed witch who had become Ch'in's lucky talisman. Emperor Zhu showered me with gifts. I had beautiful robes of embroidered silk to wear, strings of pearls, the finest jade jewelry.
And although