On Writing Romance_ How to Craft a Novel That Sells - Leigh Michaels [104]
• Use slang with extreme caution. Today's catchwords are almost guaranteed to be dated by the time a book is put into print. What is new and fresh in the center of the nation may already be dead on the coasts. If you must use slang, make sure that its meaning is clear from the context in which it's used and that it's appropriate to the historical period, the locality, and the character.
• Don't even try to spell out a sound that is not a word. It's much better to say
"She screamed" and leave the details to the readers' imagination than to try to reproduce the actual sound.
• Avoid expletives and profanity. As a rule, romances don't contain too much foul language. Inspirationals contain none at all—ever. Most midrange romances stop at hell and damn, though single-title and chick-lit romances may indulge in the likes of fuck, Christ almighty, or shit. When considering the use of expletives
or profanity, keep in mind the characters and the circumstances—a professional woman is less likely to cut loose in her workplace than at a party or on the beach. And remember that when words are written down on paper they're more emphatic than when they're spoken. While your hero probably wouldn't use shucks or darn, it's usually better to back down at least one step from what a real person would say in the same circumstances. Or avoid the problem altogether by writing "He swore," and let the readers mentally fill in whatever expression they wish—or whichever one shocks them.
• When using foreign or unfamiliar words and phrases, translate. Readers unfamiliar with the language may feel left out if they don't understand the reference and can't look it up easily. Look for ways to give the meaning in English without making your readers feel as if you think they're too ignorant to understand it on their own. In her short contemporary Legally Tender, Michele Dunaway gives a hand to the readers who don't understand Spanish:
Bruce walked up to one of the doors and knocked on the peeling paint. ... "Maria," he called. "Maria Gonzales. Me llamo Bruce Lancaster. Open the door. I must talk to you. Clara sent me."...
"Let me try," Christina said. ... "Maria! Soy Christina Jones, la social de Bruce. Por favor abra la puerta. Le necesitamos hablar. Es muy importante." "What did you say?" Bruce asked.
"I told her I'm your partner and I asked her to open the door. It's important."
By setting the scene up this way, Dunaway must translate the phrases for Bruce— so the readers aren't made to feel dumb if they didn't get it on their own.
THE MECHANICS OF WRITING DIALOGUE
When it comes to formatting your dialogue on the page, there are a number of basic guidelines that can help you make clear to your readers exactly who's talking at any given moment. Here are the fundamental three:
1. Enclose the exact words of the speaker—a direct quote—in quotation marks. For instance:
He asked, "Will you help me?"
Only the exact words used by the speaker should be included in the quotation marks. If you're not using the exact words, summarize the sense of the sentence in narrative form and don't use quotation marks, as in the following indirect quote:
He asked if she would help him.
2. Begin a new paragraph every time the speaker changes, no matter how briefly each speaks.
Beth said, "Why?"
"Because it seemed the right thing to do, that's why."
3. Begin a new paragraph whenever you draw the readers' attention to a character other than the speaker, even if that person doesn't say anything.
Beth felt stunned. Attributions
Attributions let your readers know who is speaking. As the author, you know who's saying what—but your readers aren't going to be as closely attuned to your characters,