Power_ Why Some People Have Itand Others Don't - Jeffrey Pfeffer [101]
Anderson and Berdahl’s experiments showed that people higher in personality dominance or given control over resources were more likely to express their true attitudes and to perceive rewards as being available in situations. People lower in personality dominance with less resource control perceived situations as threats not opportunities and hid their true attitudes.
People give up their power in other ways, too. They don’t behave strategically toward people with power over them, such as their boss, and instead let their true feelings show. As a very skilled news reporter told me, he expressed his resentment toward his distant bosses who mostly spent their time managing up and did not provide the support to the news-gathering field operations that he and his colleagues wanted. But as a result, he was just perceived negatively and had even less influence. As he so nicely put it, “Either you deal with your boss, or you leave for a different company. In a small, tightly connected industry, sometimes even leaving isn’t a very good option. There is no other solution than to work with the cards you are dealt.” It may feel good to blow off steam, tell people off, and express your real inner feelings. But if the targets of your behavior are those with power, your good feelings will be quite temporary as the consequences of your actions unfold.
People sometimes give away their power by defining situations as outside of their control, thereby playing the victim role. Being a victim may help you bond with fellow victims as you commiserate about the difficulties you face, and it may excuse you from doing anything about the situation, but it won’t get you much power or approval inside companies. Melinda described interviewing two people for a job and asking each, “Among your peers, you have some you work with better than others. What’s the difference?” One candidate answered that the people he works well with are easy to work with and the ones he was challenged by were moody and hard to work with. As Melinda explained, “That candidate gave away all his power by defining the problem externally and as something he couldn’t influence. When we tell ourselves that our problems are caused by others, we spend time on why we can’t be successful. When instead we focus on what we can do, we spend time on being successful.” With that level of insight, it is no wonder that Melinda is enjoying a very successful career herself. Her wisdom applies not just to job applications but to all organizational situations.
People give away their power by not trying. If you don’t try, you can’t fail—which protects your self-esteem. But not trying guarantees failure to win the competition for power and status. Sometimes people don’t want to “play the game,” or think they won’t be good at it, or can’t see themselves following the strategies of successful, more political individuals. I am convinced that we are frequently our own biggest barriers to having as much power as we would like simply because we don’t make sufficient effort to build ourselves up. When we stop thinking of ourselves as powerless victims and cease eschewing doing the things that will bring influence, our chances of success increase dramatically. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”4 It is much more difficult for others to take away your power if you aren’t complicit in the process.
Take Care of Yourself—Don’t Expect Justice
A few years ago, Bob, the CEO of a private, venture-backed human capital software company, invited me to serve on the board of directors as the company began a transition to a new product platform and sought to increase its growth rate and profitability. Not long after I joined the board, in the midst of an