Reaction - Lesley Choyce [12]
“Thanks,” I said. “It’s very cool of you to say that.”
“Let us know if there is anything we can do,” my dad said as I put on my jacket and got ready to leave.
Just give me a new life, I wanted to say. Either that, or just fix it so I was never born.
At school that day, Ashley ran into me while I was talking to Kiley. I said goodbye to Kiley and walked Ashley to her class.
“She seems to be around an awful lot. What’s with that?” Ashley asked.
“She’s just a friend,” I said. “And I don’t have many friends.”
“Yeah, but she’s your old girlfriend.”
“That’s history. Now we’re just friends,” I said. “You feeling any better this morning?”
“About the same. I’m just getting used to it.”
“Ashley, I’m ready to take up your mom on that dinner,” I said.
“Lasagna, right?”
She phoned her mom on her cell and told her the news. It was a short conversation.
“And?” I asked.
“She’s thrilled.”
“I bet.”
When I told my parents about eating at Ashley’s, they once again said they were proud of me. I was turning into some kind of hero. And hating every minute of it.
I showed up right on time (as heroes should). Stephen greeted me at the door. Well, he opened the door and scowled. I could smell that something was burning. Mr. and Mrs. Walker were arguing in the kitchen. Stephen just walked away, and I was left standing there. Ashley came down the stairs looking a little more pale than usual. She hugged me and nodded toward the kitchen. “Mom burned the lasagna.”
We sat on the sofa and watched the news. Eventually Ashley’s parents emerged from the kitchen.
“A minor disaster,” her dad said. “We’ve phoned for pizza though.”
“I’m okay with pizza,” I said, smiling.
Mrs. Walker looked flustered, and her face was flushed. “I’m glad you came, Zach.”
“Nice to be here,” I said politely.
I’d like to say that everything went smoothly after that.
But it didn’t.
It took almost an hour for the pizza to arrive. And it was not the one they ordered.
It was cold and had anchovies, which nobody liked. I think Stephen had been smoking some weed in his room, and when he came downstairs he was acting a little funny. He didn’t actually say anything to me, just gave me looks that could paralyze.
Mrs. Walker tried to tell funny stories about when Ashley was young, but Ashley kept asking her to stop.
While we were eating, Mr. Walker flatly announced, “This is the worst pizza I’ve ever had. I’m going to call and complain.” Being agitated seemed to be his style.
“Don’t,” Mrs. Walker said and then turned to me. “Sorry about the meal, Zach.”
I shrugged. “It’s okay.”
“You don’t need to apologize to him,” Mr. Walker said.
Stephen let out a snorting laugh.
I kept trying to offer up some small talk about school or sports, but it went nowhere. It seemed that whatever I said, Ashley’s father had something negative to say about it. Pretty soon I knew I’d made a mistake by coming over and trying to be nice to her family.
After about five minutes of dead silence, I found myself saying, “Why don’t we cut through some of the crap and just talk about the baby.” I didn’t mean for it to sound hostile. I thought it would help if we could just get it out in the open. But it came out sounding all wrong.
Mr. Walker looked up from his plate. “Good point, Zach. Yes, let’s do just that. Why don’t you start us off?”
Mrs. Walker was shaking her head.
Ashley looked paler than ever. I didn’t know where to begin.
I guess my silence was another wrong response, because Stephen was out of his seat now. “Yeah, why don’t we cut through the crap,” he said. And then he leaned across the table and shoved me hard with both hands.
“Sit down,” his father ordered him.
I was trying to stay calm. I slowly started to stand. I figured I’d better just leave. Ashley took my hand, but I pulled away. “No, I think I better be going.”
“I’m so sorry,” Mrs. Walker said again.
“Mom, you don’t need to apologize,” Stephen said. I couldn’t believe this was happening. All I wanted was