Secret Love - Brenda Jackson [47]
“I can’t say it because I do love you, Jacob,” she whispered raggedly, against the lump in her throat. “If possible, I love you more than any woman has a right to love any man. You and Whispering Pines are the best things to ever happen to me. Being here has meant more to me than you’ll ever know. It has given my life so much meaning. Every day I’ve spent here I’ve felt safe, protected and special. You made me feel all those things, Jacob.”
She paused to wipe away the tears welling in her eyes before continuing. “You represent all that’s good. You are everything a man should be—honorable, respected, admired and loved. And you take your responsibilities seriously. The same would hold true with your responsibilities as a husband. And doing that can destroy you, and I refuse to let that happen. I love you, too much.”
Her gaze became more intense. “My life is everyday news, Jacob, and if you married me yours will be, too. I can’t let that happen to you. I won’t let that happen. I won’t let the media rip apart your world. Whispering Pines is your world, it’s who you are. If we were to marry, this place would become a circus. Life as you know it wouldn’t be the same. There would be reporters constantly trying to get on your land to filter out a story, there would be helicopters flying around overhead to get pictures, any word you say might end up being misquoted in some tabloid or another. Your life, Jacob, would become a living hell. I love you, too much to let that happen.”
Jake looked at her, feeling more love for her at that very moment than he thought was possible. “Fine. I hear what you’re saying, but I still want to marry you,” he said softly. “You don’t have to protect me, Diamond. I can handle all those things you’ve mentioned. With you by my side, I’ll be able to handle just about anything.”
“But that’s just it, Jacob, I won’t be here by your side most of the time. I’ll have to travel, and at times I’ll be gone for long periods of time while filming.”
“I know that, and I can handle that. But no matter where you go, you’ll know Whispering Pines is your home and that I’ll be here waiting for you. Waiting for the day you will return so that I can take care of you, ease your stress and give you the loving care you deserve and need from the rat race of your career.”
Diamond shook her head. “The price you’d pay isn’t worth loving me, Jacob.”
“Any price I pay for loving you, Diamond, would be worth it.”
Diamond began to cry, and Jake reached for her and pulled her down into his arms. He held her. He knew her fears and even understood them. He’d been friends with Sterling long enough to know how relentless and cruel the media could be sometimes.
She cried harder, and he held her tighter, comforting her and whispering words that things would be all right because they had love on their side, and their love would be enough.
Diamond struggled out of Jake’s arms and looked up at him. Her gaze was pleading. “But our love won’t be enough.”
Jake looked at her, caught by her distress and determination to sacrifice their love to protect him. “So there is no way you’ll agree to marry me?” he asked, his voice tight. No matter what, he refused to give up.
Maybe it was the way he asked the question, with deep and intense emotions, or the heart-wrenching thought that once she left Whispering Pines she would never see him again that made Diamond finally say in a subdued voice, “Yes, there is a way. And it’s the only way I will agree to,” she said, her voice raw from emotions.
“And what way is that?”
“If we marry secretly, at least for a short while. Then the media won’t know.”
Looking at her, Jake knew she was serious. Did she actually think they could keep their marriage a secret? And if he went along with it, just how long were they talking about? “For how long, Diamond? How long would you want to keep our marriage a secret?”
Discomfited by his question, she shrugged before saying, “I don’t know, Jacob. Probably for no more than a year.”
After a long, tense silence he asked, “Then what? What