Sellevision - Augusten Burroughs [13]
Looking up from his desk and seeing Leigh standing there in her two-piece beige cashmere sweater and skirt (A TSV from last month), Howard smiled. “Knock knock right back at you. Care to, uh, join me on the casting couch?” He winked and glanced in the direction of the leather sofa against the wall.
Closing the door behind her and pushing the lock button on the doorknob, Leigh walked around Howard’s desk and stood in front of him, smiling seductively and fingering the eighteeninch strand of freshwater pearls around her neck. “Well, I guess I really should thank you for my recent promotion. Or is it Max I should be thanking?”
He rose from his chair, placed his arms around Leigh’s trim waist, and whispered in her ear. “I don’t think Max is the sort of man who would appreciate a thank-you like that.”
She pressed her body into his and softly kissed his neck. “I’ve missed you,” she said. Constantly, she didn’t add.
After they made love on the throw rug, Leigh asked Howard, “When are we going to spend some real time together, not just these little afternoon escapades, but dinner or a movie? You know, those things two people do together when they care about each other?”
Leaning over to kiss her cheek, Howard assured her that as soon as the divorce proceedings were set into motion, which would be any week now, everything would be different between them. She smiled, wanting to believe him.
He stood and zipped his fly. “But, sweetheart, you know that it would be too risky for us to take chances right now. We need to act responsibly. I promise you, it won’t be like this forever.”
“I know, I’m sorry,” Leigh said. She hated herself for acting like this. “I don’t mean to pressure you, it’s just that, oh, never mind, I do understand, I really do.”
Howard looked at her, her dark hair, tight ringlets of curls that collected across her shoulders, her eyes a rich brown, “like amber,” he once told her. He studied her fine features, her long neck and legs. “Don’t forget your panties,” he said, pointing under the couch.
Leigh stood, slipped into the panties, then adjusted her top and smoothed her skirt. “Well, I better be running along, I’ve got some stuff I need to get caught up on.”
“You do that. And don’t you worry.” He wagged his finger at her. “I love you, and I just need you to be strong for me. For us.”
Leigh nodded her head. “Well, thanks again,” she said, then added quickly, “I mean for the hours.” Before turning to leave, she paused. “They’re not, you know . . .”
“No, Leigh, they’re not,” he said cutting her off. “You got those hours because you worked for them. Business is business and in this business, it all comes down to what the viewers like. And they like you.”
She smiled, walked to the door, and placed her hand on the knob.
“And, Leigh?” he said.
She turned.
“I like you, too. I more than like you.”
She left his office and returned to her own. The remainder of an apple she’d sliced in half and left next to her keyboard had turned brown, so she threw it in the trash. It hit the bottom of the can with a hollow thunk. She folded her arms on top of her desk and rested her chin on them. Was love supposed to feel like having your period without any Advil? Was this even love, or was it some sick obsession? One minute she wanted to hold him, and the next she wanted to spray Lysol in his face. It was all so Fatal Attraction. Would boiling the family pet be next? God, how could she have been so stupid? After all, she’d known Howard was married from the beginning.
She’d begun working at Sellevision right before the company Christmas party. And at the party, he had come over and started talking to her. Her, of all people. Not Peggy Jean, not Bebe, her. He told her he wanted to make sure his new host was happy, that she enjoyed her job, and she had told him yes, she was enjoying it very much.
She noticed the wedding band immediately. In fact, she made a point of looking, because she’d been attracted to him since her first interview. He was handsome, dignified—and, she