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By Root 1310 0

there she was sitting in the "bar" with a group of people. I went over and watched her, waiting for someone to leave so I could sit next to her. Nobody did. Finally she got up and walked away. I went to her and stood in front of her. I said, "What's your name?" She told me. She looked ill at ease: "Who are you?" I said, "I'm Art." "Art who?" "Art Pepper." I saw there was a sudden recognition. I had figured she was playing a game, a coy little game. I thought she really knew who I was. She said, "Art Pepper. I knew some people that knew you at Westlake School of Music." She named a bunch of people, Les McCann, Charlie Haden. I said, "I used to blow with Les McCann, and Charlie Haden-I gave him his first jazz job with my quartet." She said, "Oh, really?" I was trying to think of something to say. Usually when I talked to a girl the conversation would take a certain direction right away, but in this one nothing happened and I couldn't figure out how to break through. She looked around and said, "Oh, pardon me, I've got to circulate." I said, "What do you mean?" She said, "That's what the Saturday night party is for. There's some new girls in my tribe. I want to find out how they're doing." And she was gone.

What a drag. I started thinking maybe it was my stomach that had turned her off. I was really wiped out, and I didn't feel I was handsome anymore. But I felt that I had to have her. I couldn't give up. If I didn't make it, it wouldn't be because I didn't try.

The next day I went to the beach hoping she'd be there. I put on a bathing suit. I was worried about my stomach, but I wanted to show off my tattoos so I didn't want to wear a shirt. I got a towel and folded it over my arm like a waiter. I looked ridiculous. I had a long beach towel, so I put that around my neck and it hung right in front of my stomach. I held it with my left hand. It looked very natural. I could even leave my hands go. I figured if I laid down I'd lay on my back or on my stomach so the bulge wouldn't be noticeable.

The Synanon beach is right behind the club, and it has a fence around it with two little openings down by the water. I walked out the gate and toward the water and saw her. In a purple bathing suit. As soon as I saw purple-there was that beautiful little body. She looked like a little girl. In fact I almost felt guilty wanting her. I felt I was some lecherous old man wanting to ball a sweet little child.

She was lying on her back reading a book, one arm out to the side, holding the book in her other hand, blocking the sun. I walked by her as if I was going to the water. As I walked I stared at her, and I could see the little, curly, black hairs coming out of the sides of the little purple mound at her crotch. Beautiful legs and little, teeny toes. I walked toward the water and stood there for a minute. I was hoping she hadn't seen me, and I got scared. "What's going to happen when she sees my stomach?" I was going to go back and put a shirt on. I decided against it. I was hoping my tattoos, especially the skull, might impress her, and I've always been pretty muscular. I pretended I was looking at the water, and then I kind of yawned and walked back and stood right over her, waiting for her to say something or look at me. She just kept reading her book. I'm standing there and standing there. I said, "Hello." She said, "Hello."

By this time I had asked some people about her. I asked a friend, Paul Rainbolt, and he told me she'd been going with this Jewish cat. I'd looked at him: he wore glasses; he looked like an intellectual type cat. So I decided she was an intellectual and kind of a snob and thought she was too good for most guys.

I sat down. I talked to her, forced myself on her, forced the conversation. Finally she put down the book. I said, "It sure is lonesome here, isn't it?" She said, "Is it?" I said, "What's anybody do here anyway?" She said, "Well, it all depends on what you want to do. Probably the things you want to do you can't do here." She was "running me data." I kept pursuing the lonesome thing. Finally she came out