Suckers - Jack Kilborn [0]
Introduction by Jeff Strand
Whelp Wanted – Konrath
Poor Career Choice – Strand
Taken to the Cleaners – Konrath
A Bit of Halloween Mayhem – Strand
The Necro File – Konrath
The Lost (For a Good Reason) Adventure of Andrew Mayhem – Strand
Suckers – Konrath & Strand
Strand Interviews Konrath
Ebooks by Joe Konrath and Jeff Strand
Preview: MY GUN HAS BULLETS by Lee Goldberg
My name is Joe Konrath, and I write a mystery/thriller series about Chicago cop Jacqueline “Jack” Daniels. Jack, and her supporting cast of characters, have appeared in six novels since 2004.
One member of that supporting cast is Jack’s ex-partner, a private detective named Harry McGlade.
Even though he’s guest-starred in all of her books, Jack doesn’t like Harry. He’s an insensitive jerk, a disgusting pig, and a self-centered egomaniac who thinks he’s funny.
Which is why Harry is my all time favorite character to write for.
Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on your taste) I never get into Harry’s head in the Jack Daniels novels. He’s such a goofball that he strains credulity. If I really let Harry be Harry, the books would be disasters.
Which brings us to these short stories.
In these, I let Harry do whatever the hell he wants to. It’s liberating for me as a writer, and hopefully fun for the reader, as no other stories I’ve ever done have packed so many jokes onto the page.
A word of warning. These stories are not politically correct. They’re silly, sometimes offensive, often gory, and mostly just plain wrong. This is Harry Gone Wild, 100% Uncensored.
“Whelp Wanted” is the first Harry short I published, written for the now defunct Futures Anthology magazine. It’s quintessential Harry McGlade, taking an absurd premise to the nth degree.
“Taken to the Cleaners” was published in The Strand magazine. It’s a comedic mystery, with a ridiculous mystery at the core that just keeps getting stupider.
“The Necro File” is an anti-story. I took everything I’ve learned about story structure, plot, and characterization, and purposely ignored it. As such, it’s one of my favorite things I’ve ever written. This originally appeared in the horror anthology Like A Chinese Tattoo, and it certainly qualifies as a horror story. Or maybe “horrible” is a better word. So is “offensive.” In fact, you probably shouldn’t read it at all.
Suckers is a novella I co-wrote with Jeff Strand, originally published in a high-priced, limited hardcover edition by Delirium Books. There may still be copies available. You should buy one.
I first heard about Strand years ago, when I was attending horror conventions as a newbie author. Supposedly there was this guy who also combined scary and funny in his books. I picked up one of his Andrew Mayhem novels, loved it, and began pestering him on a regular basis to write a story with me.
Suckers is a comedic horror tale that finds Harry joining forces with a very reluctant Mayhem. It was a joy to write, because Jeff and I kept trying to make each other crack up. Don’t look for logic here. But don’t drink anything while you’re reading, because it will come out your nose.
If there’s irony to be had, it’s that after years of being funny, Strand and I recently wrote some very unfunny horror novels.
Under the name Jack Kilborn, I wrote a book called Afraid. It contains zero humor. Its goal is to scare the hell out of you.
Strand, using his own name, wrote Pressure, which may be the most terrifying novel I’ve ever read. It’s a brutal, full-throttle assault on your psyche.
You know how it’s been said that comedians have the biggest inner demons? These two books prove that comedy writers have some pretty big demons of their own.
As for Harry McGlade…
Jack Daniels, and Harry, are currently on a brief hiatus, as I’m currently writing another Kilborn book. But there is a brand new Harry short story that appears in Uncage Me, an anthology edited by Jen Jordan. I doubt that will be the last of him. Like Jack says, “Harry keeps returning, like an antibiotic resistant rash.”
I hope you enjoy the rash