Sudden Impact - Lesley Choyce [18]
I could see then that he must not have known what Jason was like to his “friends.” And I could tell that he wasn’t ready to admit that his son was dying.
“We know that Jason isn’t going to make it,” Mrs. Evans said. Jason’s father just shook his head. He looked angry—like he wanted to hit somebody. He scared me, but I wasn’t ready to back off.
“And when he dies,” I told her, “he can save Kurt’s life. If you give your permission for the transplant.”
“We already said no to the doctors. It’s too much for us to think about. Too much to ask at a time like this!” Mr. Evans shouted. His hands were clenched into fists and he was right over top of me now. I was sure he was ready to hit me, or hit something, because he was so frustrated and angry that he couldn’t do anything for his son.
I held my ground. “It is too much to ask,” I told him. “And I’m not supposed to be here asking it. But I’m asking it anyway. Jason’s death will be worth something because he’ll save another life.”
He was shaking his head no. Mrs. Evans was sobbing, but I could see she was trying to get control of herself. I was shaking too. I was so scared. I almost wished Mr. Evans would hit me and get the anger out of him. Right then I knew I was losing it, and I wanted to feel the pain that Kurt and Jason must have felt.
“Get out!” he said.
“No,” I answered. “I’m sorry to do this, but I have to. I think I know how you feel. And maybe you’ve never thought about donating part of your son’s body if he dies. But you have to think about it now. Jason was a tough guy and he didn’t back down from much. I think he’d be mad at you if you let him back down from this.”
I was shocked that I had come out and said that. I was sure it was the wrong thing to say. But suddenly Jason’s mother looked up at me. “You really did know Jason, didn’t you?”
“Not all that well,” I admitted.
“He just pretended he was tough,” his mother said. “Underneath, he was just a little boy trying to act tough.”
“I think I knew that.”
“He wanted to be the best at everything he did,” his father said. “Jason pushed himself hard. He always wanted to be the best he could be, and I think he wanted others to follow his lead.”
I nodded in agreement.
He didn’t seem so angry now. “I think Jason wanted to be some kind of hero.”
I swallowed hard and went for it. “I think he finally has his chance.”
The door opened and three doctors walked in. “It’s time,” one of them said. “You can stay in the room if you like.” They had come to shut off the life-support system.
I turned to leave. It had all been in vain.
“Wait,” Mr. Evans said. I turned around, but he wasn’t talking to me. “We want to see Dr. Bennington,” he said.
chapter seventeen
I didn’t cry at Jason’s funeral, though I was surrounded by all kinds of people in tears, including Leach and Dorfman.
My parents said they’d take time to come with me, but I convinced them it wasn’t necessary. So I went by myself. Jason’s mom spotted me after the service. She gripped hard onto my hand and wouldn’t let go as all the other adults came by to say how sorry they were. I felt confused, but I stood there until she was ready to let go. She never said one word to me.
Mr. Richards came up to me afterwards and said, “We’ll give you a ride home.” His voice sounded soft and kind.
“Okay.”
In the car, they said they wanted me to visit Kurt. He was recovering, they said, but was acting quite strange. They told me I shouldn’t be upset by anything he said.
“The poison is still in his system from when his liver wasn’t working right. They say it’ll take a while to straighten out.”
The next time I arrived at the hospital, nobody tried to keep me out. I walked with Kurt’s parents through the front door and up to that familiar room.
Kurt was propped up in bed and, it was true, he didn’t look good. His parents stayed outside and left the door closed.
“You all right?” I asked.
“Do I look all right?” he snapped.
“You look alive,” I said. “That’s a start.” But he had already hurt my feelings.
“Are you