The Contrast [29]
his consent, and that he proposed to break with Maria, whether he married me or not. But, what- ever were his intentions respecting your daughter, Sir, even to me he was false; for he has repeated the same story, with some cruel reflections upon my person, to Miss Manly.
JONATHAN
What a tarnal curse!
LETITIA
Nor is this all, Miss Manly. When he was with me this very morning, he made the same ungenerous reflections upon the weakness of your mind as he has so recently done upon the defects of my person.
JONATHAN
What a tarnal curse and damn, too!
DIMPLE
Ha! since I have lost Letitia, I believe I had as good make it up with Maria. Mr. Van Rough, at present I cannot enter into particulars; but, I believe, I can explain everything to your satisfaction in private.
VAN ROUGH
There is another matter, Mr. Van Dumpling, which I would have you explain. Pray, Sir, have Messrs. Van Cash & Co. presented you those bills for accept- ance?
DIMPLE
The deuce! Has he heard of those bills! Nay, then, all's up with Maria, too; but an affair of this sort can never prejudice me among the ladies; they will rather long to know what the dear creature pos- sesses to make him so agreeable. [Aside.] Sir, you'll hear from me. [To Manly.]
MANLY
And you from me, Sir--
DIMPLE
Sir, you wear a sword--
MANLY
Yes, Sir. This sword was presented to me by that brave Gallic hero, the Marquis De la Fayette. I have drawn it in the service of my country, and in private life, on the only occasion where a man is justified in drawing his sword, in defence of a lady's honour. I have fought too many battles in the service of my country to dread the imputation of cowardice. Death from a man of honour would be a glory you do not merit; you shall live to bear the insult of man and the contempt of that sex whose general smiles afforded you all your happiness.
DIMPLE
You won't meet me, Sir? Then I'll post you for a coward.
MANLY I'll venture that, Sir. The reputation of my life does not depend upon the breath of a Mr. Dimple. I would have you to know, however, Sir, that I have a cane to chastise the insolence of a scoundrel, and a sword and the good laws of my country to protect me from the attempts of an assassin--
DIMPLE
Mighty well! Very fine, indeed! Ladies and gen- tlemen, I take my leave; and you will please to observe in the case of my deportment the contrast between a gentleman who has read Chesterfield and received the polish of Europe and an unpolished, untravelled American. [Exit.
Enter MARIA.
MARIA
Is he indeed gone?--
LETITIA
I hope, never to return.
VAN ROUGH
I am glad I heard of those bills; though it's plaguy unlucky; I hoped to see Mary married before I died.
MANLY
Will you permit a gentleman, Sir, to offer himself as a suitor to your daughter? Though a stranger to you, he is not altogether so to her, or unknown in this city. You may find a son-in-law of more fortune, but you can never meet with one who is richer in love for her, or respect for you.
VAN ROUGH
Why, Mary, you have not let this gentleman make love to you without my leave?
MANLY
I did not say, Sir--
MARIA
Say, Sir!--I--the gentleman, to be sure, met me accidentally.
VAN ROUGH
Ha, ha, ha! Mark me, Mary; young folks think old folks to be fools; but old folks know young folks to be fools. Why, I knew all about this affair. This was only a cunning way I had to bring it about. Hark ye! I was in the closet when you and he were at our hours. [Turns to the company.] I heard that little baggage say she loved her old father, and would die to make him happy! Oh! how I loved the little baggage! And you talked very prudently, young man. I have inquired into your character, and find you to be a man of punctuality and mind the main chance. And so, as you love Mary and Mary loves you, you shall have my consent immediately to be married. I'll settle my fortune on you, and go and live with you the remainder
JONATHAN
What a tarnal curse!
LETITIA
Nor is this all, Miss Manly. When he was with me this very morning, he made the same ungenerous reflections upon the weakness of your mind as he has so recently done upon the defects of my person.
JONATHAN
What a tarnal curse and damn, too!
DIMPLE
Ha! since I have lost Letitia, I believe I had as good make it up with Maria. Mr. Van Rough, at present I cannot enter into particulars; but, I believe, I can explain everything to your satisfaction in private.
VAN ROUGH
There is another matter, Mr. Van Dumpling, which I would have you explain. Pray, Sir, have Messrs. Van Cash & Co. presented you those bills for accept- ance?
DIMPLE
The deuce! Has he heard of those bills! Nay, then, all's up with Maria, too; but an affair of this sort can never prejudice me among the ladies; they will rather long to know what the dear creature pos- sesses to make him so agreeable. [Aside.] Sir, you'll hear from me. [To Manly.]
MANLY
And you from me, Sir--
DIMPLE
Sir, you wear a sword--
MANLY
Yes, Sir. This sword was presented to me by that brave Gallic hero, the Marquis De la Fayette. I have drawn it in the service of my country, and in private life, on the only occasion where a man is justified in drawing his sword, in defence of a lady's honour. I have fought too many battles in the service of my country to dread the imputation of cowardice. Death from a man of honour would be a glory you do not merit; you shall live to bear the insult of man and the contempt of that sex whose general smiles afforded you all your happiness.
DIMPLE
You won't meet me, Sir? Then I'll post you for a coward.
MANLY I'll venture that, Sir. The reputation of my life does not depend upon the breath of a Mr. Dimple. I would have you to know, however, Sir, that I have a cane to chastise the insolence of a scoundrel, and a sword and the good laws of my country to protect me from the attempts of an assassin--
DIMPLE
Mighty well! Very fine, indeed! Ladies and gen- tlemen, I take my leave; and you will please to observe in the case of my deportment the contrast between a gentleman who has read Chesterfield and received the polish of Europe and an unpolished, untravelled American. [Exit.
Enter MARIA.
MARIA
Is he indeed gone?--
LETITIA
I hope, never to return.
VAN ROUGH
I am glad I heard of those bills; though it's plaguy unlucky; I hoped to see Mary married before I died.
MANLY
Will you permit a gentleman, Sir, to offer himself as a suitor to your daughter? Though a stranger to you, he is not altogether so to her, or unknown in this city. You may find a son-in-law of more fortune, but you can never meet with one who is richer in love for her, or respect for you.
VAN ROUGH
Why, Mary, you have not let this gentleman make love to you without my leave?
MANLY
I did not say, Sir--
MARIA
Say, Sir!--I--the gentleman, to be sure, met me accidentally.
VAN ROUGH
Ha, ha, ha! Mark me, Mary; young folks think old folks to be fools; but old folks know young folks to be fools. Why, I knew all about this affair. This was only a cunning way I had to bring it about. Hark ye! I was in the closet when you and he were at our hours. [Turns to the company.] I heard that little baggage say she loved her old father, and would die to make him happy! Oh! how I loved the little baggage! And you talked very prudently, young man. I have inquired into your character, and find you to be a man of punctuality and mind the main chance. And so, as you love Mary and Mary loves you, you shall have my consent immediately to be married. I'll settle my fortune on you, and go and live with you the remainder