The Contrast [8]
to the emotions of patriotism, dilates at the plaudits of every unthink- ing girl; whose laurels are the sighs and tears of the miserable victims of his specious behaviour,--can he, who has no regard for the peace and happiness of other families, ever have a due regard for the peace and happiness of his own? Would to heaven that my father were not so hasty in his temper? Surely, if I were to state my reasons for declining this match, he would not compel me to marry a man, whom, though my lips may solemnly promise to honour, I find my heart must ever despise. [Exit.
END OF THE FIRST ACT.
ACT II. SCENE I.
Enter CHARLOTTE and LETITIA.
CHARLOTTE [at entering].
BETTY, take those things out of the carriage and carry them to my chamber; see that you don't tumble them. My dear, I protest, I think it was the home- liest of the whole. I declare I was almost tempted to return and change it.
LETITIA
Why would you take it?
CHARLOTTE
Didn't Mrs. Catgut say it was the most fashionable?
LETITIA
But, my dear, it will never fit becomingly on you.
CHARLOTTE
I know that; but did you not hear Mrs. Catgut say it was fashionable?
LETITIA
Did you see that sweet airy cap with the white sprig?
CHARLOTTE
Yes, and I longed to take it; but, my dear, what could I do? Did not Mrs. Catgut say it was the most fashionable; and if I had not taken it, was not that awkward, gawky, Sally Slender, ready to purchase it immediately?
LETITIA
Did you observe how she tumbled over the things at the next shop, and then went off without purchasing anything, nor even thanking the poor man for his trouble? But, of all the awkward creatures, did you see Miss Blouze endeavouring to thrust her unmerciful arm into those small kid gloves?
CHARLOTTE
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
LETITIA
Then did you take notice with what an affected warmth of friendship she and Miss Wasp met? when all their acquaintance know how much pleasure they take in abusing each other in every company.
CHARLOTTE
Lud! Letitia, is that so extraordinary? Why, my dear, I hope you are not going to turn sentimentalist. Scandal, you know, is but amusing ourselves with the faults, foibles, follies, and reputations of our friends; indeed, I don't know why we should have friends, if we are not at liberty to make use of them. But no person is so ignorant of the world as to suppose, be- cause I amuse myself with a lady's faults, that I am obliged to quarrel with her person every time we meet: believe me, my dear, we should have very few acquaintance at that rate.
SERVANT enters and delivers a letter to CHAR- LOTTE, and--[Exit.
CHARLOTTE
You'll excuse me, my dear. [Opens and reads to herself.
LETITIA
Oh, quite excusable.
CHARLOTTE
As I hope to be married, my brother Henry is in the city.
LETITIA
What, your brother, Colonel Manly?
CHARLOTTE
Yes, my dear; the only brother I have in the world.
LETITIA
Was he never in this city?
CHARLOTTE
Never nearer than Harlem Heights, where he lay with his regiment.
LETITIA
What sort of a being is this brother of yours? If he is as chatty, as pretty, as sprightly as you, half the belles in the city will be pulling caps for him.
CHARLOTTE
My brother is the very counterpart and reverse of me: I am gay, he is grave; I am airy, he is solid; I am ever selecting the most pleasing objects for my laughter, he has a tear for every pitiful one. And thus, whilst he is plucking the briars and thorns from the path of the unfortunate, I am strewing my own path with roses.
LETITIA
My sweet friend, not quite so poetical, and a little more particular.
CHARLOTTE
Hands off, Letitia. I feel the rage of simile upon me; I can't talk to you in any other way. My brother has a heart replete with the noblest sentiments, but then, it is like--it is like--Oh! you provoking girl, you have deranged all my ideas--it is like--Oh! I have it--his heart is like an old maiden lady's band- box; it
END OF THE FIRST ACT.
ACT II. SCENE I.
Enter CHARLOTTE and LETITIA.
CHARLOTTE [at entering].
BETTY, take those things out of the carriage and carry them to my chamber; see that you don't tumble them. My dear, I protest, I think it was the home- liest of the whole. I declare I was almost tempted to return and change it.
LETITIA
Why would you take it?
CHARLOTTE
Didn't Mrs. Catgut say it was the most fashionable?
LETITIA
But, my dear, it will never fit becomingly on you.
CHARLOTTE
I know that; but did you not hear Mrs. Catgut say it was fashionable?
LETITIA
Did you see that sweet airy cap with the white sprig?
CHARLOTTE
Yes, and I longed to take it; but, my dear, what could I do? Did not Mrs. Catgut say it was the most fashionable; and if I had not taken it, was not that awkward, gawky, Sally Slender, ready to purchase it immediately?
LETITIA
Did you observe how she tumbled over the things at the next shop, and then went off without purchasing anything, nor even thanking the poor man for his trouble? But, of all the awkward creatures, did you see Miss Blouze endeavouring to thrust her unmerciful arm into those small kid gloves?
CHARLOTTE
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
LETITIA
Then did you take notice with what an affected warmth of friendship she and Miss Wasp met? when all their acquaintance know how much pleasure they take in abusing each other in every company.
CHARLOTTE
Lud! Letitia, is that so extraordinary? Why, my dear, I hope you are not going to turn sentimentalist. Scandal, you know, is but amusing ourselves with the faults, foibles, follies, and reputations of our friends; indeed, I don't know why we should have friends, if we are not at liberty to make use of them. But no person is so ignorant of the world as to suppose, be- cause I amuse myself with a lady's faults, that I am obliged to quarrel with her person every time we meet: believe me, my dear, we should have very few acquaintance at that rate.
SERVANT enters and delivers a letter to CHAR- LOTTE, and--[Exit.
CHARLOTTE
You'll excuse me, my dear. [Opens and reads to herself.
LETITIA
Oh, quite excusable.
CHARLOTTE
As I hope to be married, my brother Henry is in the city.
LETITIA
What, your brother, Colonel Manly?
CHARLOTTE
Yes, my dear; the only brother I have in the world.
LETITIA
Was he never in this city?
CHARLOTTE
Never nearer than Harlem Heights, where he lay with his regiment.
LETITIA
What sort of a being is this brother of yours? If he is as chatty, as pretty, as sprightly as you, half the belles in the city will be pulling caps for him.
CHARLOTTE
My brother is the very counterpart and reverse of me: I am gay, he is grave; I am airy, he is solid; I am ever selecting the most pleasing objects for my laughter, he has a tear for every pitiful one. And thus, whilst he is plucking the briars and thorns from the path of the unfortunate, I am strewing my own path with roses.
LETITIA
My sweet friend, not quite so poetical, and a little more particular.
CHARLOTTE
Hands off, Letitia. I feel the rage of simile upon me; I can't talk to you in any other way. My brother has a heart replete with the noblest sentiments, but then, it is like--it is like--Oh! you provoking girl, you have deranged all my ideas--it is like--Oh! I have it--his heart is like an old maiden lady's band- box; it