• Choose a category
• All
• Classic-Fiction

—KATE, MOM TO LUCIA, 6 MONTHS

With a three-month-old, you’re constantly learning about him and getting it wrong some of the time. I don’t feel EC is any more or less that way than anything else. When things are overwhelming, we just don’t do it at that moment.

—ERIK, DAD TO XANDER, 3 MONTHS

Sometimes we have more misses than catches, so we just change the diaper and move on. I just lay off and forget about EC for a while, like until the next nap or the next day.

—EMILY, MOM TO OSCAR, 6 MONTHS

IF YOUR BABY ACTS FUSSY

Some newborns may act quite distressed by the act of going to the bathroom. It’s a new and sometimes uncomfortable sensation for them. If faced with this situation, you have a couple of options. You can begin putting baby in the newborn in-arms hold right away and hold him over a bowl, toilet, or sink (yes, a sink; you can easily disinfect it afterward, and the height of a sink makes it an ideal place to potty a newborn!), but if your baby is still so young that he is disturbed by the change of position or the feeling of air on his body, you can simply cradle him in your arms over a loose diaper (or even not so loose, though loose makes it easier for you to confirm he’s going) and cue him. Keep in mind, where he goes does not matter. What is important is that you are helping him form associations between his elimination and your cueing, your sound, and your reassuring, gentle presence. There is time enough in the future for him to start transferring that association to a specific position or place, such as a potty. Right now, the most important thing is to just let him know that you are there, that you are as aware as he is that he’s going to the bathroom, and that you are helping him with his desire not to soil himself.

Some babies will cry right when they are about to go to the bathroom (or even during). This can be very confusing for you as a parent. Sometimes you may wonder if the baby is actually crying precisely because you are trying to potty her! In reality, many babies do cry when they are going to the bathroom, and we are just not aware of it if they are being diapered full-time. I’ve spoken to many parents, in fact, who say that their baby’s “colic” symptoms disappeared once they started pottying them, because they were actually crying about the need to go to the bathroom.

The sensation of having to go to the bathroom and the feeling of releasing it can be frightening to a small baby, especially if she has been going in a diaper and is still fighting against that natural instinct not to soil herself. She also may not feel completely secure in the position in which you are holding her. This is a phenomenon that generally dissipates with time. You can always experiment with other positions, or cue your baby to go in a diaper, before trying that position again when baby is a bit older. Be reassuring and loving the entire time and hold her close in your arms.

If the crying persists or if your baby is quite obviously distressed, this may be a sign that she is experiencing some physical discomfort related to the act of elimination itself. It is important to remain watchfully observant and ask your doctor if you have any concerns. I know a doctor who actually figured out through EC that her baby had a urinary tract infection before the baby even presented with a fever. Other possible explanations for the crying are that your baby dislikes the feel of air on her naked body (keep the room warm and most of her body bundled up as best you can, whether you are changing her diaper or practicing EC) or that she has a red or raw bottom because of diaper rash. If the latter reason is the case, keep in mind that EC is the very best way to prevent diaper rash! The feeling of pee on those raw, irritated skin surfaces can be painful until she heals. At least you can minimize the amount of time she spends sitting in a dirty diaper if you EC.

EC is also beneficial because it allows you to pinpoint exactly what triggers your baby’s crying. If