The Education of Millionaires - Michael Ellsberg [45]
SPIRITUALITY, PURPOSE, AND MEANING. If you’ve thought a great deal about the more existential, philosophical aspects of life, and have come to some personal wisdom or understanding in these areas through your own life journey, providing support in these realms is often a great way to serve people who are more powerful and successful than you are. (See Success Skill #1 on connecting with your sense of purpose and meaning.) Stories of people who “make it” in the world of material success, money, and fame, and then feel “empty inside,” are a dime a dozen. In fact, they are the rule, not the exception, when it comes to material wealth.
Our society is largely organized around pursuing material wealth. And obviously, I have nothing against material wealth, honestly gained; in fact, I’m actively working to bring more of it into my own life. But most people don’t realize, until they have it (if then), that beyond bare minimums, increasing your material wealth doesn’t bring remotely commensurate increases in well-being. It just doesn’t.
Thus, I’ve found that, almost without exception, wealthy, successful, famous, and powerful people I’ve met struggle with spiritual and existential questions of meaning, purpose, and inner fulfillment in their lives. They are often thrilled to have someone talk about these issues with them, and to lend an ear. In fact, I’ve found that powerful mentors are often more likely to struggle with these questions on a day-to-day basis than less materially successful people. For a simple reason. Many less wealthy people either (a) are so desperate to get wealthier that they bulldoze over these more philosophical questions entirely in their mad race up the ladder, or (b) have already come to peace with the existential questions of their lives, in which case they’re not struggling with these questions—they’re just out in the world, serving their purpose, or enjoying their lives with gratitude, or both.
If they’re not totally caught up in amassing more wealth and power, however, it’s the wealthy ones who often struggle with these questions. They’ve reached the top of the ladder, and they realize that the whole mad race to the top was in many ways a farce to begin with—it simply doesn’t deliver the lasting fulfillment it was supposed to. So they begin pondering these bigger questions of the meaning of their lives.
Of course, there are many wealthy, connected, or powerful people who are totally switched on spiritually and existentially, and are using their power and influence for a greater purpose, to change the world. (These are the best people in the world to know because they are creating our future. Get under their fountain and push them up as much as possible.)
But many others in this position are deeply confused, lost, unhappy, even despairing in their lives. If you have reached some peace, reflection, or wisdom about the spiritual or existential questions of your life, you can often offer a great service by sharing this peace and reflection with those whom you wish to become your teachers in the realms of business and money. Often, just having a real, honest, human-to-human conversation about life’s biggest questions can gain you a new friend for life.
HOBBIES, PASSIONS, AND CAUSES. You can often connect with influential people through shared hobbies and passions. Of course, this knowledge has been keeping golf courses running for centuries. I happen to have no interest in golf whatsoever, so I’m not going to write to you about golf. But I’ve found that cultivating a wide range of cool, hip, discussion-worthy hobbies maximizes your chance of being able to share with and give to amazing people you meet.
I’m passionate about Cuban music and salsa dance, for example. I met my wife when I was teaching a Cuban salsa dance class at Burning Man. That was without question the single most significant instance of “networking” I’ll ever experience in my life. And it all happened because I had cultivated a passion for salsa dance.
I have a friend,