• Choose a category
• All
• Classic-Fiction

By Root 639 0

not sure what you’re thinking, all I can do is write and hope that you aren’t ripping up the letters. Are you? Maybe you should stick a piece of paper in your typewriter and type out “Stop It” and send it to me (you do have my address in L.A. don’t you? … do you even have a typewriter?). And that would do it. I’m not insensitive to out-and-out denials even though I’d be sorry to lose your friendship (we are friends, aren’t we?). I seem to have this knack for making things complicated for myself. Do I make you feel like things are messy and uncomfortable between us? How awful. Can’t we just simply be friends and just forget about whatever is messy and uncomfortable? Maybe I’m being foolish or simplistic to believe that things can be as easy as that, but why not?

So anyway, how are you? Are things okay up there in New Hampshire? Who do you hang out with? And how do you spend your days? What do you think about? Are you still painting? I am curious about your impressions of the place now. What do you see? What is your mood like after three terms there? Please write and tell me.

I just went to the kitchen for a Perrier and I overheard this fat old producer croon to this young man who bears a startling resemblance to Matt Dillon that he wants him and needs him. Why am I not surprised? I’ve been in L.A. for a long time, Sean. Nothing surprises me(!). Will you write me?

Love,

Anne

Sept 29 1983

Dear Sean,

Did you get my last letter?

My grandfather got very drunk last night and told me that everything is decaying and that we are coming to the end of something. My grandparents (who are not the most intelligent people) feel that they lived in the Golden Age and they told me that they are glad that they are going to die when they do. Last night my grandfather told me, over a huge bottle of Chardonnay, that he fears for his children and he fears for me. That was the first time I ever sensed any sincerity from him. But he truly meant it. And looking around and seeing on TV about those poor boys in Beirut or Lebanon or wherever the hell they are and hearing about these drug dealers who were all stabbed to death in the hills last night, I have to agree with him to a certain extent. I keep feeling that people are becoming less human and more animalistic. They seem to think less and feel less so that everyone is operating on a very primitive level. I wonder what you and I will see in our lifetimes. It seems so hopeless yet we must keep on trying, Sean. (I told you I was becoming more philosophical lately.) I guess we can’t escape being a product of the times, can we? Write back, please? Still having fun in the sun!

Love,

Anne

Oct 11 1983

Dear Sean,

Did you get my other letters? I’m not even sure if you are getting them. I just keep writing you letters and sending them off and I feel like I might as well be stuffing them into bottles and tossing them into the Pacific off of Malibu.

I can’t believe I’ve been here six weeks! My grandparents told me a few days ago that they very much desire for me to stay here for a year. I didn’t have the heart to tell them that I’d rather be locked in the Galleria for a year! Yes, I do like being out here. I’ve had more adventures and know more about the world than I’d have thought possible. L.A. is an exciting place to be and my depression has left. But there is a difference between visiting here and staying, living here. I don’t think I could stand being here forever. L.A. is like another planet. I mean, all these thousands of blond-haired, blue-eyed tan surfers with perfect bodies wandering the streets, driving to the beach to catch the waves in their new Porsche’s (and they are all stoned) and the beautiful older women listening to KROQ in long black Rolls-Royces, trying to find a parking space on Rodeo Drive—I don’t know, it all strikes me as a bit odd. I am kind of tired of hanging out at the same clubs night after night and laying by the pool doing all this incredible coke. (Yes, I’ve tried some of the white powder—everybody, simply everybody, does it out here and I must agree with them: