The Judy Moody Double-Rare Collection - Megan Mcdonald [18]
“I’m the best at jigsaw puzzles,” bragged Jessica Finch. “I did a five-hundred-piece jigsaw puzzle of Big Ben all by myself!” Sometimes Judy wished Jessica Finch would shut her mandible.
“Now I’ll show you what some of this stuff is for,” said Dr. Nosier. Dr. Judy got to use a stethoscope to listen to her own heartbeat! Ba-boom, ba-boom! Then she took Frank’s blood pressure (for real!), looked for Jessica Finch’s tonsils, and saw eye insides with a special kind of scope. They took turns riding on a bed called a gurney, walking with crutches, and sitting in a wheelchair.
Dr. N. turned out all the lights and showed them X-rays. There was a brain (it looked all ghosty), a dog that got hit by a car (it looked all sideways), even a violin (it looked all dead!). “X-rays help solve the mystery,” he said.
They even got to see a real live, ooey-gooey heart on a TV. “This is better than the Operation Channel at home!” Judy said.
And they got to practice on life-size dummies called Hurt-Head Harry and Trauma Tammy. “I have a practice doll, too,” said Judy. “With three heads. Hedda-Get-Betta. I practice being a doctor, like Elizabeth Blackwell.”
“How would you like to practice being a patient with a broken arm?” asked Dr. N. “And I’ll show everybody how we put on a cast.”
Judy Moody could not believe her inner, middle, or outer ears. “Can I, Mom?”
“Sure, if you want to.”
“Hold out your arm, Judy Moody, First Girl Doctor.”
Judy grinned with all seventeen muscles it takes to make a smile. She held her arm out straight as a snowman’s stick-arm. Dr. N. wrapped it around and around with soft cotton stuff.
“I’ll use a special plaster bandage that turns hard when it dries so Judy won’t be able to move that arm. That way her bone will stay in place and heal back together.”
“My radius or my ulna?” asked Judy.
“I see you know your bones! Can you still wiggle your phalanges?”
Judy wiggled her fingers. Everybody laughed.
“A not-broken arm is even better than a broken arm! I wish I never had to take it off.”
“Tell you what,” said Dr. Nosier. “If your mom says it’s okay, you can wear it home. I’ll show her how to take it off.”
“Can I, Mom? Can I? I can fool Stink! Please, pretty please with Band-Aids on top?”
“I don’t see why not,” said Mom. “Sure!”
“RARE!” said Judy. She, Judy Moody, was a mystery. A human jigsaw puzzle with a broken arm . . . NOT!
Judy was so happy from Hospital Day that even her eyebrows were smiling. She stared at all the autographs on her cast. Even Dr. Nosehair had signed it. His autograph looked like a messy blob, but still!
She could hardly wait to get home and show Dad her cast. Maybe she could even get out of setting the table, on account of her broken arm (not!). Wait till she told Stink!
When she got home, Stink was waiting at the front door. Judy held up her cast.
“You broke your arm?” asked Stink. “Sweet!”
She, Judy Moody, was in an operating mood! As soon as she got her cast off, Judy asked Stink to play Operation, a game where you remove body parts with tweezers and try NOT to make the buzzer go off.
Dr. Judy performed a delicate operation and removed butterflies from the patient’s stomach. Next she removed his broken heart. Stink went for the charley horse. Buzz! “Hey, his nose lights up red,” he said. “Like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer!”
“You did that on purpose!”
“Did not!” Stink tried to remove the pencil from the guy’s arm, to get rid of writer’s cramp. Buzz! Buzz! Buzz!
“Stink. Give me the tweezers. Your turn’s over when you buzz.”
“Let’s play something else,” said Stink.
“I know,” Judy said. “You can help me with my Human Body project for school.”
“That’s not playing. That’s homework,” said Stink.
“Fun homework,” said Judy. “I’m going to do an operation with real stitches and stuff.” Judy got out her doctor kit. “All I need is somebody to operate on.”
“You’re not operating on me. Just so you know. No slings or eye patches or anything.”
“Can I at least take your blood pressure?”
“I guess.” Judy put a cuff around Stink’s arm and pumped air into it. “I’m afraid