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The School For Scandal [37]

By Root 526 0


SIR OLIVER. Well I'm not Inquisitive--I come only to tell you,
that I have seen both my Nephews in the manner we proposed.

SIR PETER. A Precious Couple they are!

ROWLEY. Yes and Sir Oliver--is convinced that your judgment was right
Sir Peter.

SIR OLIVER. Yes I find Joseph is Indeed the Man after all.

ROWLEY. Aye as Sir Peter says, He's a man of Sentiment.

SIR OLIVER. And acts up to the Sentiments he professes.

ROWLEY. It certainly is Edification to hear him talk.

SIR OLIVER. Oh, He's a model for the young men of the age!
But how's this, Sir Peter? you don't Join us in your Friend
Joseph's Praise as I expected.

SIR PETER. Sir Oliver, we live in a damned wicked world,
and the fewer we praise the better.

ROWLEY. What do YOU say so, Sir Peter--who were never mistaken
in your Life?

SIR PETER. Pshaw--Plague on you both--I see by your sneering
you have heard--the whole affair--I shall go mad among you!

ROWLEY. Then to fret you no longer Sir Peter--we are indeed
acquainted with it all--I met Lady Teazle coming from Mr. Surface's so
humbled, that she deigned to request ME to be her advocate with you--

SIR PETER. And does Sir Oliver know all too?

SIR OLIVER. Every circumstance!

SIR PETER. What of the closet and the screen--hey[?]

SIR OLIVER. Yes yes--and the little French Milliner. Oh,
I have been vastly diverted with the story! ha! ha! ha!

SIR PETER. 'Twas very pleasant!

SIR OLIVER. I never laugh'd more in my life, I assure you: ha! ha!

SIR PETER. O vastly diverting! ha! ha!

ROWLEY. To be sure Joseph with his Sentiments! ha! ha!

SIR PETER. Yes his sentiments! ha! ha! a hypocritical Villain!

SIR OLIVER. Aye and that Rogue Charles--to pull Sir Peter out of the
closet: ha! ha!

SIR PETER. Ha! ha! 'twas devilish entertaining to be sure--

SIR OLIVER. Ha! ha! Egad, Sir Peter I should like to have seen
your Face when the screen was thrown down--ha! ha!

SIR PETER. Yes, my face when the Screen was thrown down: ha! ha! ha!
O I must never show my head again!

SIR OLIVER. But come--come it isn't fair to laugh at you neither
my old Friend--tho' upon my soul I can't help it--

SIR PETER. O pray don't restrain your mirth on my account: it does
not hurt me at all--I laugh at the whole affair myself--Yes--yes--
I think being a standing Jest for all one's acquaintance a very happy
situation--O yes--and then of a morning to read the Paragraphs about
Mr. S----, Lady T----, and Sir P----, will be so entertaining!--
I shall certainly leave town tomorrow and never look mankind
in the Face again!

ROWLEY. Without affectation Sir Peter, you may despise the ridicule
of Fools--but I see Lady Teazle going towards the next Room--I am sure
you must desire a Reconciliation as earnestly as she does.

SIR OLIVER. Perhaps MY being here prevents her coming to you--
well I'll leave honest Rowley to mediate between you; but he must
bring you all presently to Mr. Surface's--where I am now returning--
if not to reclaim a Libertine, at least to expose Hypocrisy.

SIR PETER. Ah! I'll be present at your discovering yourself there
with all my heart; though 'tis a vile unlucky Place for discoveries.

SIR OLIVER. However it is very convenient to the carrying on of
my Plot that you all live so near one another!
[Exit SIR OLIVER.]

ROWLEY. We'll follow--

SIR PETER. She is not coming here you see, Rowley--

ROWLEY. No but she has left the Door of that Room open you
perceive.--see she is in Tears--!

SIR PETER. She seems indeed to wish I should go to her.--how
dejected she appears--

ROWLEY. And will you refrain from comforting her--

SIR PETER. Certainly a little mortification appears very becoming
in a wife--don't you think it will do her good to let her Pine
a little.

ROWLEY. O this is ungenerous in you--

SIR PETER. Well I know not what to think--you remember Rowley
the Letter I found of her's--evidently intended for Charles?

ROWLEY. A mere forgery, Sir Peter--laid in your way on Purpose--
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