The Sky's the Limit - Marco Palmieri [125]
“But no slight is intended, Counselor. Simply a desire for precision. Surely if Geordi can understand that I do not mean any harm by it, then things will be all right.”
Deanna took a slow breath. “I’m not sure it’ll be that easy, Data. You need to ask yourself—could it be that they’re sensing something real? Some emotion in yourself that you haven’t recognized?”
He was surprised, hurt. “Surely you do not believe I intend to belittle others.”
“No, of course not. But the thing about having emotions is that our conscious intentions are not always the only things that influence our actions. Sometimes we can be hurtful to others without even realizing it.”
She leaned forward. “You spoke before of how it irritated you to be interrupted, and how impatient it made you when Borges lectured you on things you already knew.”
“That is correct.”
“So would you say your pride was hurt? That you felt you were being condescended to?”
“I believe that would be a valid interpretation.”
“And you think it was justified for you to react with irritation and impatience in those cases.”
“Perhaps I could have handled the emotions better, but yes, I believe I was entitled to feel them.”
“Then what about when the situation is reversed? When you are the one doing the lecturing, the interrupting, the correcting? Isn’t it reasonable to expect them to feel the same way?”
“I suppose so,” he said after a pause.
“So if you act as though it’s justified for you to react that way when they do it to you, but unreasonable for them to do so in the reverse case, doesn’t that suggest a double standard? The idea that you’re somehow above the restrictions they should be bound by?”
“That is not—” He broke off, frowning, and did not continue. At length, he spoke again. “So what you are saying is that…the emotion chip has made me obnoxious and insensitive.” He seemed genuinely concerned at the possibility. “Perhaps it is malfunctioning or innately flawed. Doctor Soong was often regarded as imperious by his colleagues, so perhaps this is reflected in the chip’s programming. Or it could have absorbed something from its time in Lore…”
“Data,” she said, “I can’t speak to the technical side of the matter. That’s something you and Geordi will have to explore if you think it’s necessary. But I want you to consider the possibility that the problem could be within yourself.”
He examined her. “What specific fault do you propose? Some form of incompatibility between my positronic net and the emotion chip?”
She shook her head. “That’s not what I mean. From what you’ve told me, it sounds as though Borges’s disapproval, and particularly Geordi’s, made you very hurt and angry.”
“Correct.”
“Often, the things that make us angriest are the things we fear the most. Arrogance and hostility are often compensation for feelings of inadequacy and insecurity.” She leaned forward. “All your life, Data, you’ve believed that you wouldn’t be complete until you achieved humanity. And since you weren’t human, you’ve always believed you were less than you should be. Before, that was simply a detached appraisal to you, with no strong value judgment implied. Now, though, you have an emotional context for that feeling of deficiency, and it worries you. It’s possible that it’s manifesting as an inferiority complex.”
Data frowned. “I do not understand, Counselor. How could my beliefs from the time before the emotion chip affect my emotional state now?”
“Emotions aren’t separate from cognitive thought, Data. They interact with it closely, and it shapes them as much as they shape it. Your belief in your incompleteness is a lifelong habit.” She paused. “Tell me: why did you feel you needed this chip?”
He was surprised at the question. “Because I wished to possess emotion.”
“But isn’t that a contradictory statement? Doesn’t the very existence of