Trainspotting - Irvine Welsh [113]
— Well, ah still fuckin say yir fuckin spoilin it fir ivray cunt else.
— How?
— Cause ah fuckin sais, that’s fuckin how! Begbie hisses, pointing to himself.
Renton shrugs again. There was little sense in arguing further.
They hurry the meal down, all except Kelly, who plays with her food, oblivious to the ravenous stares of the others. Eventually, she scrapes some bits and pieces onto Franco and Gav’s empty plates.
They are asked to leave after chanting: — Oooh to, ooh to be, oooh to be a Hibby! when a nervous and uncomfortable looking guy in a Hearts shell-top walks in for a takeaway. This sets off a medley of football and crap pop songs. The woman at the counter threatens to phone the police, but they vacate the premises with good grace.
They stop off at another pub. Renton and Kelly stay for one drink, then slope off together. Gav, Dawsy, Begbie, Spud and Alison continue drinking heavily. Dawsy, who has been teetering for some time, passes out. Begbie gets in tow with a couple of psychos that he knows at the bar, and Gav has a proprietory arm around Alison.
Spud hears T’Pau’s ‘China In Your Hand’ starting, and immediately realises that Begbie is up at the juke-box. He always seemed to put on either that one, Berlin’s ‘Take My Breath Away’, the Human League’s ‘Don’t You Want Me’ or a Rod Stewart song.
When Gav staggers off to the toilet, Alison turns to Spud. — Spu . . . Danny. Let’s get ootay here. Ah want tae go hame.
— Eh . . . aye . . . likesay.
— Ah dinnae want tae go hame oan ma ain Danny. Come wi us.
— Eh, yeah . . . hame, right . . . eh . . . right.
They slink out of the smoke-filled bar as surreptitiously as their wasted bodies allow.
— Come hame an stey wi us fir a while Danny. Nae drugs or anything. Ah dinnae want tae be oan ma ain just now, Danny. Ken what ah’m sayin? Alison looks at him tensely, tearfully, as they lurch along the street.
Spud nods. He thinks he knows what she is saying, because he doesn’t want to be alone either. He can never be sure though, never, ever quite sure.
Feeling Free
Alison’s getting really terrible. Ah’m sitting here wi her in this cafe, tryin tae make sense ay the rubbish that she’s talkin. She’s bad-mouthing Mark, which is fair enough, but it’s starting tae get oan ma wick. I know that she means well, but what about her and Simon, who just comes along and uses her when he’s got naebody else tae fuck? She isnae exactly in the best position tae talk.
— Dinnae get me wrong, Kelly. Ah like Mark. It’s jist that he’s goat a load ay problems. He isnae what you need right now.
Ali’s being protective because ah got fucked about wi Des, and the abortion and aw that. It’s such a pain in the arse though. She should hear herself. Tryin tae kick heroin, n she feels she’s in a position tae tell everybody else how tae live thir lives.
— Aw aye, n Simon’s what you need?
— Ah’m no sayin that Kelly. That’s nothing tae dae wi it. Simon’s at least tryin tae keep off the smack, Mark doesnae gie a toss.
— Mark isnae a junky, he jist uses sometimes.
— Aye sure. What fuckin planet are you oan Kelly? That’s how that Hazel lassie tore up his caird. He cannae leave the gear alane. You’re even talkin like a junky yirsel. Keep thinkin like that, n you’ll be oan it as well, soon enough.
Ah’m no gaunnae argue wi her. It’s time for her appointment at the Housing Department anywey.
Ali’s doon tae see aboot her rent arrears. She’s pretty mad, like, screwed-up and tense; but the guy behind the desk’s awright. Ali explains that she’s oaf the gear n she’s been for a few job interviews. It goes quite well. She gits given a set amount tae pay back each week.
Ah kin tell thit Ali’s still uptight though, because ay the wey she reacts when these guys, workies, whistle at us ootside the GPO.
— Awright doll? one shouts.
Ali, crazy fuckin cow that she is, turns oan the guy.
— Have you goat a girlfriend? Ah doubt it, because yir a fat, ugly prick. Why no just go intae the toilet wi a dirty book and have sex wi the only person crazy enough tae touch