Unequal Childhoods - Annette Lareau [35]
Garrett anticipates unusual soccer events such as a trip to another state for a tournament, with enthusiasm. On the Wednesday night before the weekend trip, when he is in bed and under the covers and his mother is wishing him good night, Garrett says excitedly: “Two more days ‘til we go!” Similarly, Garrett is excited when he gets his new Intercounty soccer uniform emblazoned with the word “SELECT.” He begins investigating the new clothes as soon as he and his father get in the car at the end of practice.
Don and Garrett put on their seat belts. Garrett immediately opened the bag and looked at the stuff. He took a green nylon jacket that said SELECT out of the bag. Garrett said, “I think I’m going to wear this.” Don said, “That’s what it’s for.” Garrett seemed excited by the jacket. He then peered into the bag (a brown paper bag) and said there are two shirts, pants (which were actually bright green shorts) and two pairs of socks. Garrett listed aloud everything in the bag. He sounded excited.
Once home, he immediately shows the uniform to his mother and siblings. Such displays of pleasure and enthusiasm for his activities are genuine, but they are also selective. For example, although Garrett is put on the all-star team in baseball, he reports that “I wasn’t [as] excited [as] I was when I found out I made Intercounty and the Forest traveling team.” But, he also explains, “baseball’s like my fourth sport,” ranking behind his two soccer teams and basketball. The number of major events in Garrett’s life seems to dull their individual importance. For example, the spring concert at school, in which he plays saxophone in a trio, generates little interest for Garrett. In the working-class families we observed, comparable school events were the subject of extensive discussion and anticipation. Similarly, events that working-class and poor children find exciting—like having pizza, a bakery cake, or a party with extended family relatives—do not appear to matter to Garrett.
Some days, Garrett is exhausted and moody:
Garrett was in a bad mood . . . He got dropped off by Brian’s dad at 8:20 P.M. He went inside. He didn’t say hello to anyone. He didn’t say anything to me when I commented on how he got his hair chopped off. He seemed quiet, remote. He basically said nothing the whole night. Don came home at 9:30 P.M. Don came in and said [to the baby-sitter], “Hi Frankie. It’s good to see you.” Frankie stood up and he and Don shook hands. Don then said, “Hi, Garrett.” Garrett did not answer. Don said, “Hi, Garrett.” Garrett looked at Don and said, “Hi.” Don asked, “How are you, Garrett?” Garrett replied, “Okay.” Don turned and went into the kitchen.
We observed similar exhaustion among other middle-class children. Alexander Williams, a Black middle-class boy, looked worn out as he traveled from after-school care to Friday night choir; a Black middle-class girl, Stacey Marshall, fell asleep under the hair dryer on a Saturday afternoon. We did not see comparable signs of exhaustion in the working-class and poor children. If anything, adults commented on these youngsters’ boundless energy.
A CULTIVATED CHILDHOOD: SPENCER’S AND SAM’S VIEWS
The organization of middle-class family life around individual children’s activities shapes the experience of all family members, including siblings who are not themselves involved in a given activity. Both