Welcome to the Monkey House - Kurt Vonnegut [45]
"Move diagonally one square toward me, Lieutenant," Kelly ordered the pilot. The pilot hesitated. "Move! Do you hear?"
"Yessir." The tone was mocking. "Retreating, eh, sir?" The lieutenant slouched into the square, slowly, insolently.
"Check again, Major," Kelly said evenly. He motioned at the lieutentant. "Now my bishop has your king in check." He closed his eyes and told himself again and again that he had made no miscalculation, that the sacrifice had won the game, that there could be no out for Barzov. This was it—the last of the three moves.
"Well," said Barzov, "is that the best you can do? I’ll simply move my queen in front of my king." The servant moved the piece. "Now it will be a different story."
"Take his queen," said Kelly to his farthest-advanced pawn, the battered T-4.
Barzov jumped to his feet. "Wait!"
"You didn’t see it? You’d like to take it back?" taunted Kelly.
Barzov paced back and forth on his balcony, breathing hard. "Of course I saw it!"
"It was the only thing you could do to save your king," said Kelly. "You may take it back if you like, but you’ll find it’s the only move you can make."
"Take the queen and get on with the game," shouted Barzov. "Take her!"
"Take her," echoed Kelly, and the servant trundled the huge piece to the side lines. The T-4 now stood blinking at Barzov’s king, inches away. Colonel Kelly said it very softly this time: "Check."
Barzov exhaled in exasperation. "Check indeed." His voice grew louder. "No credit to you, Colonel Kelly, but to the monumental stupidity of Pi Ying."
"And that’s the game, Major.’’
The T-4 laughed idiotically, the corporal sat down, the lieutenant threw his arms around Colonel Kelly. The two children gave a cheer. Only Margaret stood fast, still rigid, frightened.
"The price of your victory, of course, has yet to be paid," said Barzov acidly. "I presume you’re ready to pay now?"
Kelly whitened. "That was the understanding, if it would give you satisfaction to hold me to it."
Barzov placed another cigarette in his ivory holder, taking a scowling minute to do it. When he spoke, it was in the tone of the pedant once more, the wielder of profundities. "No, I won’t take the boy. I feel as Pi Ying felt about you—that you, as Americans, are the enemy, whether an official state of war exists or not. I look upon you as prisoners of war.
"However, as long as there is no official state of war, I have no choice, as a representative of my government, but to see that all of you are conducted safely through the lines. This was my plan when I resumed the game where Pi Ying left off. Your being freed has nothing to do with my personal feelings, nor with the outcome of the game. My winning would have delighted me and taught you a valuable lesson. But it would have made no difference in your fates." He lighted his cigarette and continued to look at them with severity.
"That’s very chivalrous of you, Major," said Kelly.
"A matter of practical politics, I assure you. It wouldn’t do to precipitate an incident between our countries just now. For a Russian to be chivalrous with an American is a spiritual impossibility, a contradiction in terms. In a long and bitter history, we’ve learned and learned well to reserve our chivalry for Russians." His expression became one of complete contempt. "Perhaps you’d like to play another game, Colonel—plain chess with wooden chessmen, without Pi Ying’s refinement. I don’t like to have you leave here thinking you play a better game than I."
"That’s nice of you, but not this evening."
"Well, then, some other time." Major Barzov motioned for the guards to open the door of the throne room. "Some other time," he said again. "There will be others like Pi Ying eager to play you with live men, and I hope I will again be privileged to be an observer." He smiled brightly. "When and where would you like it to be?"
"Unfortunately, the time and the place are up to you," said Colonel Kelly wearily. "If you insist on arranging another game, issue an invitation, Major, and I’ll be there."
(1953)
TOM EDISON’S