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Where Mercy Is Shown, Mercy Is Given - Duane Dog Chapman [95]

By Root 1097 0
keep acting recklessly, making foolish choices and hanging out with the wrong crowd, what will happen to me?” In the end, I think you’ll find that none of those answers work in your favor. In fact, they all lead you toward the same result. Do something now to change your circumstances before it’s too late. If you don’t know how to take that first step, you can contact a local help line by calling 411. All calls are anonymous and will be held in the strictest of confidence. The help line will be able to guide you to a safe place in your community where you can get the help you want, need, and deserve. I often remind myself that writing bail means having to watch my heart. If a client jumps on me, it feels like one of my own kids is running. It hurts my feelings so bad when one of my clients jumps bail. I get mad at first, but only until I catch him.

So many of the cases I’ve been a part of don’t have happy endings. I’ll sometimes spend hours explaining to my clients all of the reasons they need to get their lives together, much like you see me do on the show after we make an arrest. Those conversations in the backseat are real—they reflect who I am. I want these men and women to know that they have it in their power to change the way things are in their lives. Most of them won’t end up doing anything about it, but at least I planted the first seed toward change if they want it.

Women who jump surprise me more than men. More female clients discover the straight and narrow path than males, although there have been some memorable exceptions. When I first started bounty hunting, I pretty much worked alone. I didn’t want anyone along for the ride or to share in the glory. I found it sometimes made things easier for me, especially when tracking down a female fugitive.

Back in the day, one of the most memorable women I ever went after was a girl named Susan. I was chasing her for a buddy of mine. I’d spent a couple of days looking for her around Denver, when someone tipped me off on where she was staying. When I called the number my contact provided, Susan answered the phone.

“Hey, baby. How ya doing?” I asked in my coolest, sexiest voice.

Susan didn’t recognize me at all. Why would she? We had never actually met. I played like we had, though. I told her we hung out down at her favorite bar, the Blue Café. Susan suddenly realized, or thought she had, exactly who I was.

“Are you the guy with the beard and the blue eyes?” she asked.

“No, honey. That ain’t me. I have the long blond hair.”

“Ohhh. Right. Yes. Man, that was a couple of weeks ago. I was so hammered that night I could barely remember my own name!” And then she began shamelessly flirting. The more she talked, the less I had to. And boy, did she start to sweet talk me. That’s when I knew she was mine for the taking. When I asked her out on a date for the next night, she immediately said yes.

I showed up at her door the next day looking sharp and ready for the night. I had a photo of Susan from her bondsman so I could be certain I had the right chick before arresting her. The moment she opened the front door, I knew it was her. I told her I thought we’d catch a movie at the local drive-in. It seemed like a good idea. Given the conversation we’d had the night before, I didn’t think she’d mind. I was eager to get her out to the truck, but then her mother came to the front door to meet me. I had to be polite, like I was excited to be taking out her daughter. After a few minutes of small talk, I took Susan by the arm and walked her to my truck. I opened the passenger door and did all of the gentlemanly things I would have done if this had been a real date. Just as I walked around to get into my vehicle, I noticed her brother walk up to the driver’s side door. He was wearing army fatigues and looked like a real killer.

“Be cool with my sister, man.” I could tell he was being serious.

“I will,” I said. I backed out of her driveway and headed to the drive-in. As we drove away, I asked Susan about her brother.

“Your brother sure seems protective. What was he doing at your

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