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By Root 10199 0

man B makes fun of man B. Either way, man B is made fun of. However, the target of the humor is not always as important as the source. If man A teases man B, man A has the upper hand. But if man B teases himself, it is man B who gains dominance in the conversation. On the topic of the wedding that Jimmy Kimmel and Artie Lange attended, Lange says, “Um, but I was glad you were at my table, man, cause it was all good looking people. You uglied it up a bit.” Kimmel responds, “I know, yeah. That’s uh…yeah we make quite an imposing pair.” The men go on, both making fun of what they describe as mutual ugliness. Later in the conversation, Lange begins to tease Kimmel about the host’s girlfriend, saying that the couple was engaging in frequent displays of public affection at the wedding. In this situation, Kimmel does not transform Lange’s teasing into self-deprecation, but instead tries to remove the teasing altogether.

Lange: And so I’m thinking I’m not gonna be the only single loser there and then you and Sarah—I look over and it’s like you were shooting Nine and a Half Weeks or something.

Kimmel: Oh, no it wasn’t.

Lange: You oughta, you oughta see these two.

Kimmel: That’s not true.

Lange: “So Jim there’s a broad over there we could dance with” he’s like (kissing face).

Kimmel: Stop it. That wasn’t me—

Lange: I’m telling you, she—

Kimmel: That’s really embarrassing cause that wasn’t me. Maybe you’re confusing me with Corolla, people do that from time to time.

In this excerpt, Lange shatters the mutual self-deprecation that the two had been enjoying earlier, teasing Kimmel about something that Kimmel is clearly not comfortable being teased nor teasing himself about. As a result, Lange has dominance in this conversation. Kimmel struggles to recapture a sense of control, telling Lange that he is the one who should be embarrassed, at which point he bring ups a third party, actor Adam Corolla, to be the subject of the teasing. [The writer is seeing the questions and making them explicit; then characteristically, she seeks out points of connection with the lens:] Why did Kimmel choose to be self-deprecating about his looks but not his relationship? One possibility, as Tannen suggests, is that men are uncomfortable discussing “personal relationships and feelings” (Understand 276). Whatever Kimmel’s reasons were, his shifting behavior in this conversation depicts the varying forms and uses of teasing. Teasing can be transformed into self-deprecation, providing the self-deprecator with dominance. But, when the teasing is resisted, the teaser has the opportunity to gain the upper hand. This sheds light on the nature of teasing as a move that provides the teaser with control, regardless of if the teaser is another man or the target of the teasing himself.

Perhaps, then, self-deprecating humor also functions as a sort of pre-emptive move in which one man points out his own flaws before the other man has the chance to do so. If a man makes fun of himself, he still has control. He refuses to surrender this power to another man and thus surrender a hierarchical position in the conversation. Take, for example, this excerpt from Senator John McCain’s conversation with NBC host Jay Leno:

Leno: And you went up to the mountains too?

McCain: We went up to our place near Sedona and had a very nice time and—

Leno: Now which house is that, number twel—

McCain: You know that’s uh let’s see it’s a very…let’s see… twenty-seven.

Leno was on the verge of making a dig about the senator’s many homes, but McCain, seeing this coming, beat Leno to the punch, cutting him off before he even finished the word “twelve.” McCain then goes on to exaggerate the number of homes that he owns. This shows that McCain not only understands the public’s perception of him, he also is aware that his surplus of homes is a funny, and perhaps even embarrassing, subject. Thus, McCain uses self-deprecation to control the conversation, taking away Leno’s opportunity to laugh at him before he laughs at himself.

Perhaps the most frequent