A Million Little Pieces - James Frey [153]
He stares at me. He laughs.
I did her a few times myself. She has that nice little body and those big, fat lips and she knows how to use them, and she’ll let you do just about anything to her. Her Boy, my Buddy, got in a jam with a Dealer. You could say he overextended his credit. The Dealer agreed to let him off the hook if he gave Lilly to him and my Buddy made the deal. He didn’t really give a shit about her, I guess because it’s hard to respect a whore, so without her knowing why, he took her to the Dealer’s House. When they got there, she started smoking crack and took a bunch of Valium and got all trashed. Then the Dealer’s friends came over.
Bobby laughs. The man smiles and takes a drag of his cigarette and he stares at me and I stare back. I can feel the Fury rising. Unlike most of the episodes with it, it is not directing its rage and anger and urge to destroy at me, but at him. I can feel it. The Fury rising.
From there it got ugly. Fifteen guys got in line and they put Lilly facedown on the floor and they started fucking her. They fucked her mouth, fucked her pussy, fucked her in the ass, fucked her everywhere and in every way you could imagine. All fifteen of them fucked her, a few more than once, and not one of them wore a rubber. They came all over her. On her back and her stomach, in her hair and on her face, in every fucking hole she’s got.
Bobby laughs again.
About two guys in she tried to get up and leave, but they wouldn’t let her. They held her down and they laughed at her and they fucked her. One after another after another, and she couldn’t do a damn thing about it, and after they were done, and she was screaming and crying and going fucking crazy, she tried to gather up her clothes, but they wouldn’t give them to her. They gave her a trash bag instead, one of those big, black plastic ones, and they cut two armholes in the side, and they made her put it on. Then the Dealer opened up the door and he grabbed her by the hair and he threw her out, just like a piece of fucking garbage.
Bobby laughs louder, bangs his hand on the table. The man looks at him and smiles, looks back at me.
From what I know, she came up here straight after that. Jumped in a car with her batty old Grandma and drove as fast as she fucking could. I think she met you a few days later. If I were you, I’d be careful. That Girl’s got some dangerous shit floating around inside of her, and if she hasn’t already, she’ll probably give you something that’ll make your goddamn dick fall off.
The man smiles at me. He stubs out his cigarette in an ashtray. I hear Bobby laughing, and out of the corner of my eye, I see him his raise his hand. The man chuckles and hits it, as if receiving thanks for the words he has spoken. I clench my jaw. I stare at the man. The Fury is up. It is at full strength I want to kill kill kill. I don’t care that Lilly has done whatever she has done. Her sins, if there are any, are not to be judged by me. I care that this man has defiled her. Not in body, but in name. I care that he has spoken of her as if she were a piece of meat, as if she were less than human, as if she were something to be degraded and debased by him and others. The Fury is at full strength. I want to kill kill kill. I step forward.
Why’d you tell me that story?
Because I felt like it.
Because you felt like it?
Yeah.
Lilly’s had a brutal fucking life. She doesn’t need to have you talking shit about her.
You gonna give me a fucking Lecture?
Did it make you feel better about yourself to tell me that?
What?
Did it make you feel like more of a man, like you had some power over me or her?
Fuck you.
Did it make you feel like you were different from her, even though you know you’re not, or did it make you feel good, even though deep inside you feel like a piece of shit?
Fuck you.
Did it?
Fuck you.
I step forward.
Last time we met, you let me slide. I’m gonna let you slide now. But if you ever speak