Business Networking and Sex - Ivan Misner [80]
FIGURE 6.3—What Is the Most Important Trait or Characteristic of a Good Networker?
“Works their network effectively” was ranked next highest by both genders. On the other hand, women placed slightly more importance than men on following up, good listening skills, and sincerity. These priorities may be linked to the female prerequisite to develop a relationship before doing business. In other words, the preference for those traits supports the comfort level women create with “people,” rather than “business leads.”
Interestingly, more men than women voted that positive attitude was an important networking skill. While neither gender likes a chronic complainer, men may have less of a proclivity to dedicate time to emotional nuances. It’s possible that men simply see negative networkers as energy-sapping, time-wasting, and unproductive, not to mention the red flag downer aspect.
One of our respondents argued:
Generalizing about men and women, rather than distinguishing between personality types, can be dangerous. I feel just as comfortable in a room full of men as women, unless they start talking about something I am completely disinterested in, like football. The same level of disengagement happens to me if I’m in a room full of women and they start talking about handbags, another subject I couldn’t care less about. The most successful networkers just evaluate people as having a need, and then find the best way to help them.
He Says . . .
This question is one that I feel we guys win! Here is the way we ranked the most important characteristics of a networker, and we are right!
1. Trustworthy
2. Likes helping others
3. Has a positive attitude
We men believe that if someone is a good networker they must first be trustworthy; second, be the type of person who likes to help others; and third, have a positive attitude. Is this a surprise to anybody?
If I don’t trust you, then I may be friendly to you but don’t consider you part of my true network. If someone makes it into my network it means I’m willing to work with them and refer and recommend them to others. Not everyone is going to be “the best” at what they do. Besides the fact that “best” is a subjective term, it is really meaningless. What I’m looking for is someone I can trust. I need to be able to trust them with my business, friends, family, clients, and associates.
I need to know that when I introduce this person to my inner circle of networking associates that he or she is going to deliver. If they don’t treat my people right, they not only hurt their reputation with me and my network, but they’ve also hurt my reputation. This is not allowed!
I want to surround myself with people who are team players, people who understand that in order to achieve success in life you must first help others do the same. If someone doesn’t like to help others then they just don’t get it. They certainly don’t get me. However, when I see someone who goes the extra mile, puts others’ needs in front of their own—this is a person I want to be related to. This is a networker who is valuable not just to me but to everyone I have a relationship with. I believe in helping others and want to surround myself with people who feel the same.
Positive attitude? Duh! Of course. Who wants to hang out with negative people? We all have positive and negative stuff happening. Life offers all kinds of challenges on a daily basis. Sometimes the only way to get through them is with a positive attitude and support system around you of like-minded folks.
Business can take many hours and a lot of hard work. The more positive people you have around you, the better results you’ll get because the more stimulated you’ll stay, which will help you achieve more. Positive people inspire, motivate, encourage, and help in many ways.
See, ladies, we men are not so bad. Trustworthy, likes