Life! By Design_ 6 Steps to an Extraordinary You - Laura Morton [23]
“Then you shouldn’t be working for me anymore.” My response was quick but sincere. I wasn’t firing him. I was setting him free from the resistance he’d been feeling and the animosity that was growing inside him every time he walked through our door.
“Let’s figure out your strategy. Let me help you make a plan so you can achieve the goals you’ve set.” We spent the next several minutes doing just that, talking about his future and what steps he needed to take to get there.
“I cannot believe I had been holding on to these feelings for the past several months. I didn’t know how to say that you’ve led me down a path of ‘extraordinary’ and yet the work I do for you only pays ‘ordinary.’”
Working for me was a boulder in his river. Once he removed it from the stream, everything began flowing as it should. A few months after leaving the company, he had a new job, met a fabulous woman, got married, and was living his dream.
If you don’t deal with the issues that hold you back, they become like a pot of boiling water that eventually bubbles over. Once that happens, there’s usually a giant mess to clean up, but then everything is better because nothing is still festering in the pot. You’ve got to release your negative emotions, remove the boulders that are impacting your life’s flow. I call this getting back to neutral, the place I like to live where there is no stress and no worry.
I know that many of you have been extremely successful throughout your lives and are highly analytical and hard chargers. The focus of this book isn’t about your career, though; it’s about creating a balance in all the areas that make up the whole of your life.
The areas we will delve into together go beyond your outer shell. The explorations are designed to tap into your vulnerable side, a place that few people have the courage or ability to go on their own. I will push you to engage with your thoughts, your feelings, and ultimately the people around you. The questions you’ll face throughout this book will most likely make you feel uncomfortable. If that happens, promise me you won’t stop reading. I am not asking you to merely face your pain and self-imposed limitations. I want you to feel and be present with them so we can work on ways to ultimately let it all go.
Pain is a sign that you’re awake from your coma, so don’t be freaked out by the feelings.
This chapter will help you explore your professional life, your lifestyle, and your health and vitality—the three main areas that make up your life. In addition, we will take a closer look at where resistance is showing up for you. As I mentioned in the Introduction, when I begin working with clients, phase one always starts with me asking questions about their lives so I can help them identify areas in which they’ve been living by default. Then we can start creating their By Design plan. Since you and I don’t have the luxury of doing this in person, I have created my exclusive Core Value Assessment to help you gain insight and clarity about where default living is showing up for you.
EXERCISE
For the sake of the following exercise, I’ve purposely asked simple yes or no questions. These questions are designed to look for emotional triggers, so you can easily identify the areas in your life that need attention. Don’t overthink or overanalyze your answers. Trust your gut and answer yes or no.
Professional
•Do you feel secure in your work?
•Does the economy worry you?
•Do you believe you are paid fairly for your work?
•Are you passionate about the work you do?
•Do you feel relevant to the needs of your marketplace?
•Are you current on technology?
•Are you clear on the value you