Meandering Mind - Eva Dillner [42]
On Sunday I did a brief check in using talking dog. After a few shares the space went quiet and it felt like it was time for the next something. The person who had complained about the exercises on Saturday and had wanted things her way didn't show on Sunday, she had the stomach flu. Emotional issues were churning in her stomach.
I explained name singing and how to weave in intention. I wished to continue the theme of transformative full moon and to get to know one another. The name singing was powerful and varied.
After lunch we ended up sitting around and just chatting until it was time to go. The conversation was relaxed, easy, explorative and it flowed naturally. We had our chairs pulled around in a scattered fashion, yet we were all in a circle. It felt very comfortable.
We had succeeded in laying the foundation for a group that could really explore and play with possibilities. The concept was off to a great start to be tested and perhaps brought out into the world. I felt like the igniters, or the starters had come together and the work we were doing would be taken back to their places and reverberate out into the world.
It's Monday as I write this, the day after. This morning I woke up and danced, shook out a lot out of my arms and hands. I knew I needed to capture the essence of what we had done this weekend.
I feel a quiet satisfaction, content. You know how after some courses you feel euphoric, or processed? This was the in between, just being in contentment and ease. This is how life was meant to be.
It's important that we carefully laid the groundwork and built the trust. Letting ourselves open at a mellow pace. Next month is digging deep and that feels so appropriate.
Paint without Purpose
After playing with possibilities I sorted and pondered and laid on the couch staring into space, did some spring-cleaning, which is an important part of any process. Before the new can come in, we have to clean out the old. And sure enough, a new creative idea popped in, inspired by a series of events.
When I moved back to Sweden in the late 90's I had no idea I would end up teaching toning. I had participated in weekly toning groups for about four years in Seattle with Marline Lesh and Diana Nielsen and went to the monthly gatherings of the Sound Healers of Washington. I did it because it was fun. I enjoyed it. I liked the groups and it helped me open up my throat and find my voice. When I started I firmly believed what I had been told all my life, “you can't carry a tune.” When my friend told me about the toning group I shyly asked if I could come too. Everyone else was trained in voice or music or communication and I had no training and I thought I had no talent. They said, “yes, of course you are welcome.”
So I went and discovered that I do indeed have a voice and I can tone quite well. Hmmm... so it is when you do something just for yourself without attachment to the outcome.
Funny how the universe prepares you. I teach from a presence, in the now, perspective, that this is something we all can do. All we need to do is get out of the way, relax, and let our bodies remember how to do it. No forcing, keep breathing in and out until the sound comes naturally. One woman sat through a whole semester without making a sound.
Another thread was my mail to my friend, meet without expectation, to explore our connection without any preconceived ideas of where we were going or why.
Then the weekend of play, letting it unfold in the present. And the strong message or idea that I wanted to do courses again. The trick was finding the thread, or focus, that excited my life energy. What I have learned about getting groups together is that it can't be completely leaderless and it needs a focus, thread or main theme.
Since the year 2000 I have been painting with a Vedic Art group. We meet one weekend a month and I do it for fun, to have some social contact, get to play with colors and just be. In Vedic Art there are seventeen principles that lead you to the state of I