The Dark Side of Disney - Leonard Kinsey [1]
Sex
o At the Resorts
o In the Parks
o How to Find Someone to Have Sex With
o Alternative Lifestyle Activities
o The Last Resort (Escort Services)
Drugs
o Where to Score?
o How to Safely Get High in the Parks
o Top 5 Best and Worst Places to Get High
Rock N’ Roll
o Rock Venues On-Site
o Food and Wine “Eat to the Beat”
o Nightly Epcot Acts
Chapter 3: Tricks, Tips, Scams… and Bugs
Front of the Line With a Wheelchair
Taking the Resort Monorail
FastPass Scams
Refillable Mugs
Pin Trading Scams
Bed Bugs and Other Creepy Crawlies
Chapter 4: Off-Limits Exploration
Sneaking Into The Utilidors
Backstage at Epcot
Interview with Shane Perez (Discovery Island Urban Explorer)
Interview with Hoot Gibson (Mesa Verde Times/Fresh Roasted Corn)
Epilogue
Acknowledgements
Index
Introduction
You hold in your hands the key to a Walt Disney World vacation unlike any other. Regardless of how much money you make, or how many times you’ve already been to the parks, or how much you totally fucking hate “It’s a Small World”, this book will show you a side of WDW that is unique, exciting, and absolutely, unequivocally, NOT authorized by Disney. Within these pages you’ll not only find tips on the best deals for airfare, food, and lodging (tips banned from official guidebooks and even most unofficial websites and messageboards), but diatribes on the best places in the parks to have sex, do drugs, and see a gritty rock show, complete with women throwing their underwear on the stage. You’ll hear from people who have jumped out of ride vehicles and explored off-limits areas, who have swam across alligator infested lakes to see the ruins of abandoned parks, and who have dodged security to traverse the mysterious tunnels underneath The Magic Kingdom. You’ll find tips on avoiding not only the dangerous Florida wildlife, but also the dangerous scammers who swarm Orlando like mosquitoes, just waiting to weasel you out of your hard-earned cash with their counterfeit merchandise, illegal ticket resales, and hard-sell timeshare presentations.
I’ve gathered all of this information over 33 years of visiting Walt Disney World, fortunate enough to have been born in Clearwater, Florida, and to have had a mother who shared my Disney obsession. Even though we were decidedly lower-middle class, she worked hard so she could spoil me and my sister with “Four Season Salute Passes” every Christmas, allowing us to visit as often as we wanted during non-peak months. And visit often we did, making the two-hour drive to Orlando at least once a month, often staying overnight at the (as of that time) only affordable on-site lodging, The Caribbean Beach Resort.
I don’t remember my first visit to The Magic Kingdom; I was only 16 months old, but I have seen the pictures and I look pretty fucking thrilled. However, I do distinctly remember my excitement when, in 1st grade, I found a promotional book for EPCOT Center that had been sent to my teacher and unceremoniously shoved into the community bookshelf, just waiting to get torn apart by my snot-nosed classmates. I promptly stole the book, and spent hours poring over the concept art, genuinely believing that this park would be the best place in the world. Luckily, my mother was the manager of a day care, and since EPCOT at that time was touting itself as learning center (something that has long since been abandoned), she was able to snag opening-day tickets after much pleading on my part. I remember that first visit to EPCOT, in awe at seeing the concept art I’d been studying come to life, and having my mind blown by the architecture, animatronics, and a totally kick-ass vision of the future. I fell in love with computers that day, and became a nerd for life. And I remember knowing with all my heart that, yes, this actually was the best place in the world. I still believe that to this day.
Because, and I want to make this clear, I LOVE WALT DISNEY WORLD! I know the parks like