The Deeper Meaning of Liff - Douglas Adams [22]
Plymouth (PLIM-uth) vb.
To relate an amusing story to someone without remembering that it was he who told it to you in the first place.
Plympton (PLIMP-ton) n.
The knob on top of a war memorial.
Pocking (POKK-ing) n.
The pointless tapping of a cigarette before getting on with the business of smoking it.
Podebrady (POHD-bray-dee) n.
The man in dirty white overalls hired to wander whistling around the corridors of a large corporation to make it look as if the management’s getting something done.
Pofadder (POF-ad-er) n.
A snake that can’t be bothered to bite you.
Poffley End (POF-lee-END) n.
The green bit of a carrot.
Poges (POH-jez) pl. n.
The lumps of dry powder that remain after cooking a packet of soup.
Polbathic (pol-BATH-ik) adj.
Gifted with ability to manipulate taps using only the feet.
Pollatomish (pol-i-TOH-mish) adj.
Peevish, restless, inclined to pull the stuffing out of sofas.
Polloch (POL-ukh) n.
One of those tiny ribbed-plastic and aluminium foil tubs of milk served on trains enabling you to carry one safely back to your compartment where you can spill the contents all over your legs in comfort trying to get the bloody thing open.
Polperro (pol-PER-oh) n.
The ball, or muff, of soggy hair found clinging to bath overflow holes.
Polyphant (POL-i-fant) n.
The mythical beast—part bird, part snake, part jam stain—which invariably wins children’s painting competitions in the five-to-seven age group.
Pontybodkin (PON-tee-BOD-kin) n.
The stance adopted by a seaside comedian that tells you that the punch line is imminent.
Poona (POO-nah) n.
Satisfied grunting noise made when sitting back after a good meal.
Potarch (POT-ark) n.
The eldest male in a soap opera family.
Pott Shrigley (POT SHRIG-lee) n.
Dried remains of a week-old casserole, eaten when extremely drunk at 2:00 A.M.
Prague (PRAHG) vb.
To declaim loudly and pompously upon any subject about which one has less knowledge than at least one other person at the table.
Preston Gubbals (PRES-ton GUB-uls) n.
Breasts of uneven weight.
Princes Risborough (PRIN-ses RIZ-bur-ah) n.
The right of any member of the Royal Family to have people laugh at their jokes, however weedy.
Prungle (PRUN-gul) adj.
Pretending to be proud to be single.
Pudsey (PUD-zee) n.
The curious-shaped flat wads of dough left on a kitchen table after someone has been cutting out scones.
Pulverbatch (PUL-ver-batch) n.
That part of the blurb on a dust jacket in which famous authors claim to have had a series of menial jobs in their youth.
Puning (PEW-ning) ptcpl. vb.
Boosting a man’s ego by pretending to be unable to open a screw-top jar.
Pymble (PIM-bul) n.
Small metal object about the size of a thimble which lies on the ground. When you kick it you discover it is the top of something buried four feet deep.
Q
Quabbs (KWOBZ) pl. n.
The substances which emerge when you squeeze a blackhead.
Quall (KWAWL) vb.
To speak with the voice of one who requires another to do something for him.
Quedgeley (KWEDJ-lee) n.
A rabidly left-wing politician who can afford to be that way because he married a millionairess.
Quenby (KWEN-bee) n.
A stubborn spot on a window that you spend twenty minutes trying to clean off before discovering it’s on the other side of the glass.
Querrin (KWER-rin) n.
A person who no one has ever heard of who unaccountably manages to make a living writing prefaces.
Quoyness (KWOY-nes) n.
The hatefulness of words like relionus and KopyKwik.
R
Radlett (RAD-let) n.
The single hemisphere of dried pea which is invariably found in an otherwise spotlessly clean saucepan.
Ramsgate (RAMZ-gayt) n.
All institutional buildings must, by law, contain at least twenty ramsgates. These are doors which open the opposite way to the one you expect.
Randers (RAN-ders) pl. n.
People who, for their own obscure reasons, try to sleep with people who have slept with members of the Royal Family.
Ranfurly (ran-FER-lee) adj.
Fashion of trying ties so that the long thin end dangles below the short fat end.
Ravenna