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The Deeper Meaning of Liff - Douglas Adams [23]

By Root 456 0
(rah-VEN-ah) n.

Poetic term for the cleavage in a workman’s bottom that peeks above the top of his trousers.

Rhymney (RIM-ni) n.

That part of a song lyric which you suddenly discover you’ve been mishearing for years.

Riber (RIGH-ber) n.

The barely soiled sheet of toilet paper that signals the end of the bottom-wiping process.

Richmond (RICH-mnd) adj.

Descriptive of the state that very respectable elderly ladies get into if they have a little too much sherry, which, as everyone knows, does not make you drunk.

Rickling (RIK-ling) ptcpl. vb.

Fiddling around inside a magazine to remove all the stapled-in special-offer cards that make it impossible to read.

Rigolet (RIG-oh-let) n.

As much of an opera as most people can sit through.

Rimbey (RIM-bee) n.

The particularly impressive throw of a Frisbee which causes it to be lost.

Ripon (RIP-on) vb.

(Of literary critics.) To include all the best jokes from the book in the review to make it look as if the critic thought of them.

Risplith (RIS-plith) n.

The burst of applause that greets the sound of a plate smashing in a canteen.

Rochester (RO-ches-ter) n.

One who is able to gain occupation of the armrests on both sides of their cinema or aircraft seat.

Roosebeck (RUUS-bek) n.

Useful all-purpose emergency word. When a child asks, “Daddy, what’s that bird/flower/funny thing that man’s wearing?” you simply reply, “It’s a roosebeck, darling.”

Royston (ROYS-ton) n.

The man behind you in church who sings with terrific gusto almost three-quarters of a tone off the note.

Rudge (RUDJ) n.

An unjust criticism of your ex-girlfriend’s new boyfriend.

Rufforth (RUFF-orth) n.

One who has the strength of character or loudness of voice to bring a lowthering (q.v.) session to an end.

S

Sadberge (SAD-berdj) n.

A violent green shrub which is ground up, mixed with twigs and gelatin and served with clonmult (q.v.) and buldoo (q.v.) in a container referred to for no known reason as the “relish tray.”

Saffron Walden (SAF-ron WAWL-don) n.

A particular kind of hideous casual jacket that nobody wears in real life, but which is much favored by Ed McMahon.

Salween (sal-WEEN) n.

A faint taste of dishwashing liquid in a cup of tea.

Samalaman (sam-AL-a-man) n.

One who fills in the gaps in conversations by beaming genially at people and saying, “Well, well, well, here we all are then,” a lot.

Satterthwaite (SAT-er-thwayt) vb.

To spray the person you are talking to with half-chewed breadcrumbs or small pieces of whitebait.

Saucillo (saw-SIL-oh) n.

A joke told by someone who completely misjudges the temperament of the person to whom it is told.

Savernake (SAV-an-ayk) v.

To sew municipal crests onto a jacket in the belief that this will make the wearer appear cosmopolitan.

Scackleton (SKAK-ul-tn) n.

Horizontal avalanche of cassettes that slides across the interior of a car as it goes around a sharp corner.

Scamblesby (SKAM-bulz-bee) n.

A small dog which resembles a throw rug and appears to be dead.

Scethrog (SKETH-rog) n.

One of those peculiar beards-without-mustaches worn by religious Belgians which help them look like trolls.

Sconser (SKON-ser) n.

A person who looks around them when talking to you, to see if there’s anyone more interesting about.

Scopwick (SKOP-wik) n.

The flap of skin which is torn off your lip when trying to smoke an untipped cigarette.

Scorrier (SKOR-ee-er) n.

A small hunting dog trained to snuffle amongst your private parts.

Scosthrop (SKOS-throp) vb.

To make vague opening or cutting movements with the hands when wandering about looking for a can opener, scissors, etc., in the hope that this will help in some way.

Scrabby (SKRAB-ee) n.

A dustrag given to you by your mother which on closer inspection turns out to be half an underpant.

Scrabster (SKRABZ-ter) n.

One of those dogs that has it off on your leg during tea.

Scramoge (skrah-MOHZH) vb.

To cut oneself while licking envelopes.

Scranton (SKRAN-ton) n.

A person who, after the declaration of the bodmin (q.v.), always says, “But I only had the tomato soup.”

Scraptoft (SKRAP-toft)

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