The Deeper Meaning of Liff - Douglas Adams [5]
Budby (BUD-bee) n.
A nipple clearly defined through flimsy or wet material.
Bude (bewd) n.
A polite joke reserved for use in the presence of vicars.
Budle (BEW-dul) vb.
To fart underwater.
Buldoo (bul-DOO) n.
A virulent red-colored pus that generally accompanies clonmult (q.v.) and sadberge (q.v.)
Burbage (BUR-bidj) n.
The sound made by an elevator full of people all trying to breathe through their noses.
Bures (b’YOORZ) n.
(Medical) The scabs on knees and elbows formed by a compulsion to make love on cheap floormatting.
Burleston (BER-leh-ston) n.
That peculiarly tuneless humming and whistling adopted by people who are extremely angry.
Burlingjobb (BUR-ling-job) n.
(Archaic) A seventeenth-century crime by which excrement is thrown into the street from a ground-floor window.
Burnt Yates (BURNT-YAYTS) pl. n.
Condition to which yates (q.v.) will suddenly pass without apparent intervening period, after the spirit of the throckmorton (q.v.) has finally been summoned by incessant throcking (q.v.)
Bursledon (BUR-zl-dn) n.
The bluebottle fly one is too tired to get up and swat, but not tired enough to sleep through.
Burslem (BERZ-lem) n.
One who goes on talking at three o’clock in the morning after everyone else has gone to sleep. The principal habitat of burslems is Radio 2.
Burton Coggles (BUR-tn-KOG-uls) pl. n.
A bunch of keys found in a drawer whose purpose has long been forgotten, and which can therefore now be used only for dropping down people’s backs as a cure for nosebleeds.
Burwash (BER-wash) n.
The pleasurable cool sloosh of puddle water over the toes of your rubber boots.
C
Caarnduncan (KARN-DUNK’n) n.
The high-pitched and insistent cry of the young male human urging one of its peer group to do something dangerous on a cliff edge or piece of toxic waste ground.
Cadomin (KAD-oh-min) n.
The ingredient in coffee creamer that rises to the surface as scum.
Cafu (KA-foo) n.
The frustration of not being able to remember what an acronym stands for.
Cahors (ka-HAWRZ) pl. n.
The rushes of emotion triggered by overheard snatches of an old song.
Cairo (KIGH-roh) n.
The noise of a spinning hubcap coming to rest.
Calicut (KAL-i-kut) adj.
Determined not to let someone see how much his inadvertent remark has hurt you.
Camer (KAY-muh) n.
A poorly tossed caber.
Cannock Chase (KAN-uk CHAYS) n.
In any box of After Eight Mints, there is always a large number of empty envelopes and no more than four or five actual mints. The cannock chase is the process by which, no matter which part of the box you insert your fingers into, or how often, you will always extract most of the empty sachets before pinning down an actual mint, or “cannock.”
The cannock chase also occurs with people who put their dead matches back in the matchbox, and then embarrass themselves at parties trying to light cigarettes with three-quarters of an inch of charcoal.
The term is also used to describe futile attempts to pursue unscrupulous advertising agencies that steal your ideas to sell chocolates with.
Canudos (kah-NEW-dos) n.
The desire of married couples to see their single friends pair off.
Chaling (CHAY-ling) ptcpl. vb.
Trying not to be driven up the wall by the opinions of someone whom circumstances will not allow you to argue with.
Cheb (cheb) n.
An embarrassing nickname by which a fourteen-year-old boy insists that he now wishes to be known.
Chenies (CHAY-neez) pl. n.
The last few sprigs or tassles of last Christmas’s decorations you notice on the ceiling while lying on the sofa on an August afternoon.
Chicago (shi-KAH-goh) n.
The foul-smelling wind which precedes an underground train.
Chimbote (CHIM-boh-tay) n.
A newly fashionable ethnic stew which, however much everyone raves about it, seems to you to have rather a lot of fish heads in it.
Chimkent (CHIM-kent) n.
One whose life appears not to have moved on in any direction at all when you meet him again ten years later.
Chipping Ongar (CHIP-ing-ONG-er) n.
The disgust and embarrassment