The Definitive Book of Body Language - Barbara Pease [22]
The Vise
3. The Bone-Crusher
Credibility Rating: 0/10.
A second cousin to the Vise, the Bone-Crusher is the most feared of all handshakes as it leaves an indelible memory on the recipient's mind and fingers and impresses no one other than the initiator. The Bone-Crusher is the trademark of the overly aggressive personality who, without warning, seizes the early advantage and attempts to demoralize his opponent by grinding his knuckles to a smooth paste. If you are female, avoid wearing rings on your right hand in business encounters, as the Bone-Crusher can draw blood and leave you to open your business dealings in a state of shock.
The Bone-Crusher
Unfortunately, there are no effective ways to counter it. If you believe someone has done it on purpose, you could bring it to everyone's attention by saying, “Ouch! That really hurt my hand. Your grip is too strong.” This puts the advocate of the Bone-Crusher on notice not to repeat the behavior.
4. The Finger-Tip Grab
Credibility Rating: 2/10.
A common occurrence in male-female greetings, the Finger-Tip Grab is a handshake that misses the mark and the user mistakenly grabs the other person's fingers. Even though the initiator may seem to have an enthusiastic attitude toward the receiver, he in fact lacks confidence in himself. In these circumstances, the main aim of the Finger-Tip Grab is to keep the receiver at a comfortable distance. The Finger-Tip Grab can also result from personal space differences between the people in the handshake. This could happen if one person's intimate space is two feet and the other's is three feet; the latter stands farther back during greeting so the hands don't connect properly.
The Finger-Tip Grab
If this happens to you, take the other person's right hand with your left and place it correctly in your right hand and say, with a smile, “Let's try that again!” and shake hands equally. This builds your credibility because you are telling the other person that you think they are important enough for you to get it right.
5. The Stiff-Arm Thrust
Credibility Rating: 3/10.
Like the Palm-Down Thrust, the Stiff-Arm Thrust tends to be used by aggressive types and its main purpose is to keep you at a distance and away from their personal space. It's also used by people raised in rural areas, who have larger personal space needs and want to protect their territory.
The Stiff-Arm Thrust
These people will even lean forward or balance on one foot to keep their distance when delivering a Stiff-Arm Thrust.
6. The Socket-Wrencher
Credibility Rating: 3/10.
A popular choice of power players and common cause of watering eyes and, in extreme cases, torn ligaments. This is the father of the Bent-Arm-Pull-In, and involves forcefully gripping the receiver's outstretched palm, then simultaneously applying a sharp reverse thrust, attempting to drag the receiver into the initiator's territory. This results in loss of balance and gets the relationship off on the wrong foot.
The Socket-Wrencher
Pulling the receiver into the initiator's territory can mean one of three things: first, the initiator is an insecure type who feels safe only within his own personal space; second, the initiator is from a culture that has smaller space needs; or third, he wants to control you by pulling you off balance. Either way, he wants the encounter to be on his terms.
7. The Pump Handle
Credibility Rating: 4/10.
With strong rural overtones, the pumper grabs the hand of the pumpee and commences an energetic and rhythmic series of rapid vertical strokes.
While up to seven pumps is acceptable, some pumpers continue to pump uncontrollably as if they are trying to draw water from the pumpee.
The Pump Handle
Occasionally, the pumper will cease pumping but continue to hold the receiver's hand to prevent their escape and, interestingly, few people try