The New Eve - Lewis Robert [74]
Brenda nodded her head vigorously. “My first marriage was certainly a reality check. Come to think of it, my second one isn't much better.” She smiled, but everyone could feel the pain in her voice.
“Brenda, you know we're all praying for you,” Patricia said as everyone nodded.
Anne then looked back at Susan. “All marriages have their hard moments,” she said, “but I don't think the good ones are because of luck. I know for me it has taken work, compromise, tons of honest communication, and at times some huge leaps of faith. But Art and I have experienced a good marriage for almost thirty-two years. Looking back, I see the key has been the spiritual convictions we've both held on to. That and giving God all the hurts, confusions, and disillusionments that crop up from time to time. Oh, well, that's us. Maybe your biggest challenge for being a New Eve is a huge faith leap of your own. Maybe it involves letting go of the pain from your parents' divorce and trusting God for your life.”
Susan's eyes dropped to the floor. “I think you're right,” she said. “At base it is a trust issue. Do I trust God with my future? Right now I'm just not sure I can honestly say I do. Mostly I trust myself.”
“So there's your bold move,” Patricia said excitedly. “You've identified your primary obstacle to being a New Eve. Now the question is, Can you make a trust move? Not from a career to a marriage but from your way to God's way.”
“Everyone take out your index card and grab a pen,” Anne said suddenly. “I think it would be good for each of us in turn to scratch out the obstacle we've written down on our card and write underneath it one bold move we could make as a first step to becoming a New Eve.”
“That's a good idea!” Brenda exclaimed. “And we can help each other think of what to say.”
The room grew silent for a few moments. Susan tapped her card with her pen and then wrote something down. “Anne,” she said, “here's my bold move.”
“That's the heart of the issue with me. I'm not comfortable with where my choices have been taking me. I saw my mom's life get wrecked in marriage and I've run from that and tried to establish some kind of career self-sufficiency. Now I'm thinking, Have I hardened myself against courageously pursuing some of the callings God has for me? Maybe so. I've got some thinking to do.”
The ladies then discussed how they could help each other process their bold moves over the next few months. After they had nailed down a plan, Anne spoke up.
“I want to follow up on some things Patricia said about her situation. You say you're afraid you've missed out on the good life, but I want to affirm how I've seen you be a godly example. For instance, I was amazed at the ministry you had with those inner-city kids at the community center this summer. You were an incredible leader and a huge asset in making that project a success. Also, I saw how you poured your heart out to the children you personally worked with.”
“Thank you, Anne! That's sweet of you. Your encouragement brings to mind the need to say how good God has been to me. I do think I've made some unwise choices, and that has cost me some of the good things I might have enjoyed in life. But all the same, God has provided me with many opportunities and blessings that are probably exclusive to single gals.”
She laughed in an easy manner and then continued. “It's like this: my time and my money are my own. There are no conditions on either of them. I'm able to use my resources to impact the lives of others. I've traveled the world. Sometimes for fun, sometimes for work, but I've learned that I can take the gospel with me in word and deed no matter where I am. And I've had some wonderful experiences doing so. Besides, as you all know, I was able to pick up and move here last year from Chicago so I could take care of my ailing sister. I couldn't have done that if I were married. So God has good, life-giving purposes even for us single gals! The trick is keeping that in perspective during the lonely times.”
“So what's