The School For Scandal [26]
economy! and now for hazard.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE II.--The Parlour
Enter SIR OLIVER and MOSES
MOSES. Well sir, I think as Sir Peter said you have seen Mr. Charles
in high Glory--'tis great Pity He's so extravagant.
SIR OLIVER. True--but he would not sell my Picture--
MOSES. And loves wine and women so much--
SIR OLIVER. But He wouldn't sell my Picture.
MOSES. And game so deep--
SIR OLIVER. But He wouldn't sell my Picture. O--here's Rowley!
Enter ROWLEY
ROWLEY. So--Sir Oliver--I find you have made a Purchase----
SIR OLIVER. Yes--yes--our young Rake has parted with his Ancestors
like old Tapestry--sold Judges and Generals by the foot--and maiden
Aunts as cheap as broken China.--
ROWLEY. And here has he commissioned me to re-deliver you Part
of the purchase-money--I mean tho' in your necessitous character
of old Stanley----
MOSES. Ah! there is the Pity of all! He is so damned charitable.
ROWLEY. And I left a Hosier and two Tailors in the Hall--who
I'm sure won't be paid, and this hundred would satisfy 'em.
SIR OLIVER. Well--well--I'll pay his debts and his Benevolences
too--I'll take care of old Stanley--myself-- But now I am no more
a Broker, and you shall introduce me to the elder Brother
as Stanley----
ROWLEY. Not yet a while--Sir Peter I know means to call there about
this time.
Enter TRIP
TRIP. O Gentlemen--I beg Pardon for not showing you out--this way--
Moses, a word.
[Exit TRIP with MOSES.]
SIR OLIVER. There's a Fellow for you-- Would you believe it that
Puppy intercepted the Jew, on our coming, and wanted to raise money
before he got to his master!
ROWLEY. Indeed!
SIR OLIVER. Yes--they are now planning an annuity Business--
Ah Master Rowley[,] in my Day Servants were content with the Follies
of their Masters when they were worn a little Thread Bare but now
they have their Vices like their Birth Day cloaths with the gloss on.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE III.--A Library
SURFACE and SERVANT
SURFACE. No letter from Lady Teazle?
SERVANT. No Sir--
SURFACE. I am surprised she hasn't sent if she is prevented from
coming--! Sir Peter certainly does not suspect me--yet I wish
I may not lose the Heiress, thro' the scrape I have drawn myself
in with the wife--However, Charles's imprudence and bad character
are great Points in my Favour.
SERVANT. Sir--I believe that must be Lady Teazle--
SURFACE. Hold[!] see--whether it is or not before you go to the
Door--I have a particular Message for you if it should be my Brother.
SERVANT. 'Tis her ladyship Sir--She always leaves her Chair at the
milliner's in the next Street.
SURFACE. Stay--stay--draw that Screen before the Window--that will
do--my opposite Neighbour is a maiden Lady of so curious a temper!--
[SERVANT draws the screen and exit.]
I have a difficult Hand to play in this Affair--Lady Teazle as lately
suspected my Views on Maria--but She must by no means be let into
that secret, at least till I have her more in my Power.
Enter LADY TEAZLE
LADY TEAZLE. What[!] Sentiment in soliloquy--have you been very
impatient now?--O Lud! don't pretend to look grave--I vow I couldn't
come before----
SURFACE. O Madam[,] Punctuality is a species of Constancy, a very
unfashionable quality in a Lady.
LADY TEAZLE. Upon my word you ought to pity me, do you now Sir Peter
is grown so ill-tempered to me of Late! and so jealous! of Charles too
that's the best of the story isn't it?
SURFACE. I am glad my scandalous Friends keep that up. [Aside.]
LADY TEAZLE. I am sure I wish He would let Maria marry him--
and then perhaps He would be convinced--don't you--Mr. Surface?
SURFACE. Indeed I do not.--[Aside.] O certainly I do--for then
my dear Lady Teazle would also be convinced how wrong her suspicions
were of my having any design on the silly Girl----
LADY TEAZLE. Well--well I'm inclined to believe you--besides
I really never could perceive why she should have so any admirers.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE II.--The Parlour
Enter SIR OLIVER and MOSES
MOSES. Well sir, I think as Sir Peter said you have seen Mr. Charles
in high Glory--'tis great Pity He's so extravagant.
SIR OLIVER. True--but he would not sell my Picture--
MOSES. And loves wine and women so much--
SIR OLIVER. But He wouldn't sell my Picture.
MOSES. And game so deep--
SIR OLIVER. But He wouldn't sell my Picture. O--here's Rowley!
Enter ROWLEY
ROWLEY. So--Sir Oliver--I find you have made a Purchase----
SIR OLIVER. Yes--yes--our young Rake has parted with his Ancestors
like old Tapestry--sold Judges and Generals by the foot--and maiden
Aunts as cheap as broken China.--
ROWLEY. And here has he commissioned me to re-deliver you Part
of the purchase-money--I mean tho' in your necessitous character
of old Stanley----
MOSES. Ah! there is the Pity of all! He is so damned charitable.
ROWLEY. And I left a Hosier and two Tailors in the Hall--who
I'm sure won't be paid, and this hundred would satisfy 'em.
SIR OLIVER. Well--well--I'll pay his debts and his Benevolences
too--I'll take care of old Stanley--myself-- But now I am no more
a Broker, and you shall introduce me to the elder Brother
as Stanley----
ROWLEY. Not yet a while--Sir Peter I know means to call there about
this time.
Enter TRIP
TRIP. O Gentlemen--I beg Pardon for not showing you out--this way--
Moses, a word.
[Exit TRIP with MOSES.]
SIR OLIVER. There's a Fellow for you-- Would you believe it that
Puppy intercepted the Jew, on our coming, and wanted to raise money
before he got to his master!
ROWLEY. Indeed!
SIR OLIVER. Yes--they are now planning an annuity Business--
Ah Master Rowley[,] in my Day Servants were content with the Follies
of their Masters when they were worn a little Thread Bare but now
they have their Vices like their Birth Day cloaths with the gloss on.
[Exeunt.]
SCENE III.--A Library
SURFACE and SERVANT
SURFACE. No letter from Lady Teazle?
SERVANT. No Sir--
SURFACE. I am surprised she hasn't sent if she is prevented from
coming--! Sir Peter certainly does not suspect me--yet I wish
I may not lose the Heiress, thro' the scrape I have drawn myself
in with the wife--However, Charles's imprudence and bad character
are great Points in my Favour.
SERVANT. Sir--I believe that must be Lady Teazle--
SURFACE. Hold[!] see--whether it is or not before you go to the
Door--I have a particular Message for you if it should be my Brother.
SERVANT. 'Tis her ladyship Sir--She always leaves her Chair at the
milliner's in the next Street.
SURFACE. Stay--stay--draw that Screen before the Window--that will
do--my opposite Neighbour is a maiden Lady of so curious a temper!--
[SERVANT draws the screen and exit.]
I have a difficult Hand to play in this Affair--Lady Teazle as lately
suspected my Views on Maria--but She must by no means be let into
that secret, at least till I have her more in my Power.
Enter LADY TEAZLE
LADY TEAZLE. What[!] Sentiment in soliloquy--have you been very
impatient now?--O Lud! don't pretend to look grave--I vow I couldn't
come before----
SURFACE. O Madam[,] Punctuality is a species of Constancy, a very
unfashionable quality in a Lady.
LADY TEAZLE. Upon my word you ought to pity me, do you now Sir Peter
is grown so ill-tempered to me of Late! and so jealous! of Charles too
that's the best of the story isn't it?
SURFACE. I am glad my scandalous Friends keep that up. [Aside.]
LADY TEAZLE. I am sure I wish He would let Maria marry him--
and then perhaps He would be convinced--don't you--Mr. Surface?
SURFACE. Indeed I do not.--[Aside.] O certainly I do--for then
my dear Lady Teazle would also be convinced how wrong her suspicions
were of my having any design on the silly Girl----
LADY TEAZLE. Well--well I'm inclined to believe you--besides
I really never could perceive why she should have so any admirers.