The School For Scandal [35]
Sir Peter on purpose to discover them----
SIR BENJAMIN. I tell you I have it from one----
MRS. CANDOUR. And I have it from one----
SIR BENJAMIN. Who had it from one who had it----
MRS. CANDOUR. From one immediately--but here comes Lady Sneerwell--
perhaps she knows the whole affair.
Enter LADY SNEERWELL
LADY SNEERWELL. So--my dear Mrs. Candour Here's a sad affair
of our Friend Teazle----
MRS. CANDOUR. Aye my dear Friend, who could have thought it.
LADY SNEERWELL. Well there is no trusting to appearances[;] tho'--
indeed she was always too lively for me.
MRS. CANDOUR. To be sure, her manners were a little too--free--
but she was very young----
LADY SNEERWELL. And had indeed some good Qualities.
MRS. CANDOUR. So she had indeed--but have you heard the Particulars?
LADY SNEERWELL. No--but everybody says that Mr. Surface----
SIR BENJAMIN. Aye there I told you--Mr. Surface was the Man.
MRS. CANDOUR. No--no--indeed the assignation was with Charles----
LADY SNEERWELL. With Charles!--You alarm me Mrs. Candour!
MRS. CANDOUR. Yes--yes He was the Lover--Mr. Surface--do him
justice--was only the Informer.
SIR BENJAMIN. Well I'll not dispute with you Mrs. Candour--
but be it which it may--I hope that Sir Peter's wound will not----
MRS. CANDOUR. Sir Peter's wound! O mercy! I didn't hear a word
of their Fighting----
LADY SNEERWELL. Nor I a syllable!
SIR BENJAMIN. No--what no mention of the Duel----
MRS. CANDOUR. Not a word--
SIR BENJAMIN. O, Lord--yes--yes--they fought before they left
the Room.
LADY SNEERWELL. Pray let us hear.
MRS. CANDOUR. Aye--do oblige--us with the Duel----
SIR BENJAMIN. 'Sir'--says Sir Peter--immediately after the Discovery,
'you are a most ungrateful Fellow.'
MRS. CANDOUR. Aye to Charles----
SIR BENJAMIN. No, no--to Mr. Surface--'a most ungrateful Fellow;
and old as I am, Sir,' says He, 'I insist on immediate satisfaction.'
MRS. CANDOUR. Aye that must have been to Charles for 'tis very
unlikely Mr. Surface should go to fight in his own House.
SIR BENJAMIN. Gad's Life, Ma'am, not at all--giving me immediate
satisfaction--on this, Madam--Lady Teazle seeing Sir Peter in such
Danger--ran out of the Room in strong Hysterics--and Charles after
her calling out for Hartshorn and Water! Then Madam--they began
to fight with Swords----
Enter CRABTREE
CRABTREE. With Pistols--Nephew--I have it from undoubted authority.
MRS. CANDOUR. Oh, Mr. Crabtree then it is all true----
CRABTREE. Too true indeed Ma'am, and Sir Peter Dangerously
wounded----
SIR BENJAMIN. By a thrust in second--quite thro' his left side
CRABTREE. By a Bullet lodged in the Thorax----
MRS. CANDOUR. Mercy--on me[!] Poor Sir Peter----
CRABTREE. Yes, ma'am tho' Charles would have avoided the matter
if he could----
MRS. CANDOUR. I knew Charles was the Person----
SIR BENJAMIN. O my Unkle I see knows nothing of the matter----
CRABTREE. But Sir Peter tax'd him with the basest ingratitude----
SIR BENJAMIN. That I told you, you know----
CRABTREE. Do Nephew let me speak--and insisted on immediate----
SIR BENJAMIN. Just as I said----
CRABTREE. Odds life! Nephew allow others to know something too--
A Pair of Pistols lay on the Bureau--for Mr. Surface--it seems,
had come home the Night before late from Salt-Hill where He had been
to see the Montem with a Friend, who has a Son at Eton--so unluckily
the Pistols were left Charged----
SIR BENJAMIN. I heard nothing of this----
CRABTREE. Sir Peter forced Charles to take one and they fired--
it seems pretty nearly together--Charles's shot took Place as I tell
you--and Sir Peter's miss'd--but what is very extraordinary the Ball
struck against a little Bronze Pliny that stood over the Fire Place--
grazed out of the window at a right angle--and wounded the Postman,
who was just coming to the Door with a double letter from
Northamptonshire.
SIR BENJAMIN. My Unkle's account is more circumstantial I must
confess--but