Vixen Manual - Karrine Steffans [20]
Equally dangerous is your ability to become addicted to his energy and the thrill of having a man you can boss around a bit, a man you can belittle once in a while. He even likes it! You’ll find yourself feeling like his mother one minute and his sadist the next. This can be a new, higher form of eroticism for you while simultaneously being very tedious. Keeping up with his energy requires a certain amount of energy of your own, in addition to all the other things you have going on in your life. Eat your Wheaties, girls. This one’s going to wear you out, in more ways than one.
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Vixen Tip
There are myriad reasons for dating younger men. Some of you may actually find a true soul connection in a man many years your junior. In that case, you definitely shouldn’t let age get in the way. Once you establish the necessary levels of trust, feel free to open your heart and your life up to him without bias, just as you would with a man your age or older.
In contrast, some of you may just want to experience the legendary passion and abandon that comes with being with a younger man. You want to partake of his stamina that can truly go on All. Night. Long. You want a boy toy and nothing more, and you certainly don’t want your physical desire for him to spill over into other areas of your life. If that is the case, then there are measures to be taken. Here are some rules to keep your young stud at a distance:
Give him only your mobile number.
Allow no calls after a certain hour; turn off your ringer or send him straight to voice mail.
Go apeshit on his ass if he shows up at your home unannounced. Call the police if you have to.
Chastise him as if he were your child; give him punishments, such as groundings and time-outs.
Never be seen with him in public.
Never hang out with him and his friends. You are a cougar; see him only in your den.
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Eventually, all those funny inside jokes you once shared may begin to feel like silly, distracting nuisances as you become increasingly aware of how unequally yoked the two of you really are. Perhaps he doesn’t watch the news the way you do. He never reads the paper. He wants the two of you to go out clubbing, but you’ve got to be at work in the morning. He doesn’t work because he’s still in school (college, hopefully, not high school!), or he’s just getting started in his career and his income is woefully deficient compared to yours. He looks to you for help when his bills get behind, and you find yourself feeling more and more like his mother than his lover. Every time you serve him dinner or wash his clothes, the mother feeling becomes more evident. Soon you find yourself with a grown baby on your hands, and all the fabulous sex in the world can’t make that feeling go away.
That’s not to say a younger man can’t be the one, the real one, for you. He just might be. It depends on your ages and what both of you are seeking in your lives. There’s a marked difference in being a thirty-year-old woman dating a twenty-five-year-old, and being a twenty-five-year-old woman dating a nineteen-year-old. The same is true of a woman in her forties dating a man in his thirties. The more life experience and wisdom you have between you, the better the chances of your relationship surviving.
If you’re not serious about your younger man, however, you have to be very careful. Odds are he’s growing serious about you. Separating from a younger lover can be much more difficult than parting with one your own age or older, one who’s had more experience with breakups. Your young man might not take the words “It’s over” that well.
Go easy on him. Keep in mind you’re helping to shape him for the next woman that comes along. Pay it forward, ladies. You’d want another woman to do it for you!
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Recap
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