Vixen Manual - Karrine Steffans [27]
* * *
Recap
We should all want to financially improve our lots in life, not diminish them.
What do you have to offer?
We shouldn’t expect more from our men than we do from ourselves.
If you’re dating a man for his money, odds are he’s already figured that out.
Money should never be the driving motivation for entering a relationship.
A woman who offers plenty will always get plenty in return.
* * *
Section 2
How to Attract Him
I am a firm believer that women and men misunderstand one another nearly 100 percent of the time. Men are very simple creatures, needing very little to attract them and make them happy. Women tend to complicate things with overthinking and emotional excess. Get yourselves together, girls, and the men will take notice!
Chapter Twelve
Goals
Who are you? Where are you going in life? Where do you want to go? As a woman who exists in a society historically built upon women looking for men to save them, make them whole, and, essentially, define who they are—even in these postfeminism times—let me say that not only is this notion impractical and absurd, it’s plain old dead wrong. You’ll never get anywhere thinking like this! If you want to gain and maintain control in your relationships, romantically or otherwise, you have to gain and maintain control of yourself. This means having a sense of direction. In order to achieve anything, ladies, you have got to have goals!
Who would we be if we didn’t have goals to motivate us and propel us forward? A woman without focus is just an aimless soul walking the earth, unaware of her purpose and the steps necessary to be successful in her life and in the lives of those who care for and depend upon her. Defining who you are and what you want in life should not be done for the sole objective of getting a man, but they are essential elements in doing so. Men can spot an unsure, unformed woman. Those kinds of females make for excellent prey. Duplicitous men love someone whose mind is malleable. A woman like that can be tricked into everything from making herself available for booty calls to bankrolling a man without expecting anything in return. If you fall into this category, you will find yourself not just manipulated by men but buffeted and bruised by the fancies of chance, because you don’t know how to gain your footing. Why?—because you haven’t even determined what your footing is.
* * *
Vixen Tip
It is important to organize your thoughts and start small if you have to, leading into your bigger, more long-term goals. Part of planning for those long-term goals is accomplishing the hundreds of short-term goals that will get you there. It’s good practice to start with organizing even the tiniest of tasks on a daily basis by writing them down in a daily planner.
* * *
A woman with a clear sight of her goals not only knows what she wants, she makes a plan to ensure that she gets it. Once you identify a direction for yourself and lay out a plan for achieving it, understand and accept that not everyone will be supportive, especially if what you set out to do defies their idea of convention or is something much bolder and higher than they would attempt. Do not let this prevent you from going forward. Having a strong sense of conviction and refusing to be taken off course are necessary to stay focused and geared toward a better quality of living.
* * *
Vixen Tip
I find it helpful to make a daily list of everything that needs to be done in both my personal and business lives. I keep track of everything in a yearly planner. Each day, I mark off the accomplished tasks and move on to the next. However,