Vixen Manual - Karrine Steffans [61]
* * *
Recap
Not only are our men paying attention to us, they are taking plenty of mental notes along the way.
Men may be simple creatures, but they are far from stupid.
Pay very close attention to who you are as an individual before trying to become part of a couple.
Get into his head first before you get into his bed.
Sometimes a little is just enough.
Though a single man may not be so dainty and detail-oriented in his own life and home, he will love and appreciate it in yours.
Men tend to have fantasies that the average woman thinks she cannot live up to; nothing could be further from the truth.
* * *
Section 3
How to Engage Him
Okay, now that you have captured his attention, what do you plan on doing in order to keep him? The thrill of the chase is only a small portion of the adventure. You have to keep him motivated and intrigued, wrapped up in you, unable to flinch or glance away.
Chapter Twenty-four
Love
Once you’ve found a man you can trust, then you’re free to love. Sounds great, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, it’s not always that easy. Love is an emotion that’s often involuntary, independent of choice and practical decision making. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could control how it happened, when it happened, and with whom? Of course, those objectives can be negotiated up front, as many cultures throughout the world have proven, by way of prearranged marriages predicated on social status, financial stability, business relationships between families…in other words, everything but love. The hope is that love will follow. In many cases, it does not.
* * *
Vixen Say What?
There is nothing harder to obtain or maintain in life than true love.
* * *
The reality remains, however, that when the L-word does come into play, so does its inseparable partner-in-crime—unpredictability. Love itself has a way of appearing when least expected. Sometimes, from the very moment you lay eyes on a particular man and before you’re able to establish any foundations, you realize in that moment that you are his, wholly, fully, no question. You’ve had that feeling before, haven’t you? (And if you haven’t, brace yourself for the day you do!) It is a knowing, something so big, so irresistible, so all-consuming, you can’t fight against it. And you don’t want to. You meet a man and you instantly fall in love with him, and with that feeling you’re willing to accept whatever baggage comes along. From a practical standpoint, this sounds crazy, but when the emotion hits you with gale-force intensity, it’s as real as it gets.
If this sounds like you that means you are a lover, in the truest sense of the word. You love love and all that it stands for. You embrace it. Love is the means, the end, the everything. Because of this, you give yourself over completely to your man, without terms or conditions. For many, this can be a frightening prospect, but not for the true lover. Even when your man has failed you, your feelings remain fixed, not despite his faults, but because of them. This type of love, what the Greeks called Agape—signifying a love that is self-sacrificing, unconditional, active, thoughtful, even divine—is considered the purest form, able to withstand the passage of time, even after it’s no longer romantic.
That all sounds lovely, doesn’t it? Still, you should know that just because you love your man and your love is rock strong and rock steady, this is not a sufficient reason to endure a painful relationship. Because love’s natural mate is unpredictability, it is not uncommon to find ourselves wanting to be with someone who is simply wrong for us. That doesn’t mean you can’t give yourself over to the feeling, which we’ve just addressed is a native instinct for the true lover, but you must